the girl who wears a BLACK pearl earring.

BORED SHIT. DEAD BROG!

2010-05-21T15:31:00.003+08:00

MY BLOG IS DEAD.
I HAVE NOTHING TO UPDATE.

but the semester is over!
results will be out next week!
life sucks because 50% of our report is A/A+ and the other 50% is B.
i need it to pull my GPA up!!!!!!
hope my elective get A too!

anyway love and i are still together. we are 13 months old;
very old. longest already. however, love is very patient, and we have not quarrelled. that's fantastic (though i throw tantrums like 3-4 times every week)
make it 7 days a week! (but the other 3-4 days i get to see him, and he show more love HAHA)

i'll be starting work next week.
i was enthusiastic about earning LOTS of money.
but suddenly i see the survey so long, im damn turned off!
but i'll still try to earn alot of money!
WORKAHOLIC!

im looking forward to Universal Studios! i hope boyf can make it!
though his dad already bought his tickets the silly boy might be going on his refugees trip!

my niece is going to be half a year old. and she's very cute. she knows how to walk in a walker and she can crawl out of the room herself at night. dangerous! but she's so darn cute!

i want to go overseas with boyf! either taiwan with giap or vietnam!

ok i dont know what else to say
ive been darn bored at home!

meeting up with hq.
the project group.
boyf's team.
cedar guides.
0605.

KTHXBYE!

my girl ♥

2010-02-01T01:32:00.002+08:00

i like it when i belong to somebody.
yes, im that dependent.
i like how it sounds when he calls me that.
haha.

january came to an end. and im damn lazy to talk about london/paris anymore.
because it's a 10 days event with almost 2000 pictures. but i'll try. but not now.
or you guys can just check out my 10 facebook photo albums.

haha i came back on 12th. and school starts on the 11th. and i kinda missed first week of school due to semi jet lag.

school has begun duh. and we are on week 4 already.
time flies like crazy. i haven even manage my first 3 weeks of knowledge properly and term break is coming.
juggling 2 maths related projects (which are not for my maths core but for elective and art of writing) sucks because we cant agree on one good topic.
that stinks when everyone is indecisive haha.

but otherwise school's ending on 6.30, 5.30, 4.30, 5,30, 2,30 (M T W TH F)
but starts at 12.30, 2.30, 10.30, 10.30, 9.30.
so it's manageable. most days have 1 hour of lunch break. except monday has 2 hours of breaks. so not much time wasted in school.

good thing about ending late because by the time i reach toa payoh (add about 1.5 hours),
boyf would have ended work and we can go meet (though he's always late now that it's CNY period) mind you he works on sat and sun too! AND like he was still working at 8.30pm yesterday? (SUNDAY)
im going to complain to Ministry of Manpower because they are abusing my boyf and his colleagues. even though it's CNY period. damn.
im going to call the police because the company kidnapped my boyf.

many lovely stuffs happened. followed by unlovely. then now im being loved all over again.

i figured i'll do january again.

this is a ranting post.

♥

2010-01-15T03:35:00.002+08:00

stolen from wanru's.

(:

I don’t wanna play hide and seek.
give you my clothes. tell you I love your shoes.

sit on the steps while you take a bath.
and massage your neck. kiss your face. and hold your hand. and go for a walk.
not mind when you eat my food.

and meet you at Rudy’s and talk about your day. talk about your day.
and laugh at your paranoia.
i give you tapes you don’t listen to.
watch great films. watch terrible films. and tell you about the tv programme i saw the night before.
and not laugh at your jokes.

want you in the morning. but let you sleep in for a while.
tell you how much i love your eyes, your lips, your neck.

sit on the steps smoking till your neighbours come home.
and sit on the steps smoking till you come home.
and worry when you are late.
and be amazed when you are early.

i give you sunflowers.
and go to your party and dance.

be sorry when i’m wrong.
and happy when you forgive me.

look at your photos, wished i had known you forever.

hearing your voice in my ear,
feel your skin on my skin.

and get scared when you are angry.
i tell you you are gorgeous.
and hug you when you are anxious.
and hold you when you hurt.
and want you when i smell you.
and offend you when i touch you.
and whimper when i’m next to you.
and whimper when i’m not.
smother you in the night.
and get cold when you take the blanket.
and hot when you don’t.

and melt when you smile.
dissolve when you laugh.

im sick of feeling unwanted.

-

2010-01-15T00:45:00.001+08:00

John Lennon; Wall Dream

I thought i was dreaming, it couldn't be.
But then i thought, why couldn't it be?
I was struggling to find an answer but now that i know, why should i?
Why should i let myself suffer when you don't even care?
I think back and realized what a fool i was.
As i thought harder, i sort of came across the thinking that maybe you knew.
You knew it all along.
But, but i wasn't important at all that's why you couldn't be bothered.

it's the festive season! with lots of holidays!

2009-12-29T15:51:00.057+08:00

2 more days to the new year omg!
and i still owe about 2 months worth of updates.
alot of things happened in the past 2 months.

071109
UNIFORM DATE! (which was a bit of a failure!) we met super late. ate super late. and the neoprint shop closed. super upset la! :( thought can take neoprint with our uniform like (when we were young) and we ate popeyes' chicken at the singapore flyer. nobody gave us any weird stares, does that mean we look young? hahahaha. and it was a saturday! (:

091109
went on another date. and we finally went to take neoprints! (though not in school uniform) :D:D

101109
ate nihonmura with The Supper Club! pre-exams enjoyment + ansel's birthday celebration. there were about 12 of us if i didnt remember wrongly, but yar we forgot to take a group picture :(

141109
celebrated our 7th month, which i cannot remember where we went. and no photos were taken. :/ maybe we forgot to celebrate? i know he had work that day though!

-study for exams-
-super stressed-
though lonely times in toapayoh library macdonalds myself for hours everyday. at least 10 hours. that was for the econs.
was saving 17and181109 to study for 191109's MAS213 paper.

hmmm in this month, i lost another uncle who was close to me :( he nearly passed away 3 years ago, but somebody gave him a chance to live on. 3 years later, he didnt manage to pass the next test of life. on 151109 he wasnt feeling well already, feverish and a headache. went to see a GP who couldnt find anything wrong hence was given medicine for his fever. 161109 he was in pain at home but still thought it was normal. 171109 he felt a sharp pain in his chest. i didnt have to go to school but the rest of the adults must work. my brother was working at TTSH then. so awaken by the call at 6am, brother and i went to fetch him from his home to admit him to TTSH. bro went to work and i was left to do the admin procedures. he was wheeled into A&E at 7-ish 8am and i did not see him till 6pm the same day. in the 10 hours or so, i was trying to study at the starbucks but i was so tired. and halfway the hospital called and said he actually suffered a mild heart attack and the docs would like to speak to me. called my brother and he went down with me. all the while i didnt get to see my uncle.

then after he was hospitalised, we went to the bed to see him. he looks abit blur but still very much conscious. he took out his oxygen mask because it was uncomfortable. but my brother said "no you have to put it on because you had a heart attack" and my uncle could still say "siao, how you know i got heart attack". he could still make jokes of my mother and so on. so we thought he was ok. informed the rest of the aunts, who will come the next day because it was already past visiting hours soon.

but the next morning, apparently, his condition took a change for the worse and his brain was bleeding. he was unconscious and his blood was contaminated. we stayed vigil at his side till about lunch time. i went to check in on him before leaving for lunch. but i saw that his machine was beeping. his heart rate was like 130+ i was so scared. i have to get the nurses and there was some chaos. told the rest but we stll went for lunch. when we came back, he was in a critical condition, and the doctor was about to speak to us in a room.

it was like in a drama. she was explaining his three major problems the heartattack, the blood haemorrhage and the contaminatd blood. and because my uncle was on medication to thin the blood it was difficult for them to clot his blood and stop the bleeding. and his chances of recovery were very low. i was crying by now already. i know we have to let him go soon. but because everything happened so quickly in just two days. it was more upsetting than ever. at least i was the last to see him alive. :( and at least he waited for his dearest sister to come before leaving. because while the doctor was explaining to us his condition, the nurse came in suddenly to say "the patient has collapsed" and the doctor rushed off. everyone was crying like mad. and then the doctor came back (as per drama) to say "we have already done our best" and they have to clean him up before we can see him. cant imagine how bloody the scene was. :(

then after all the crying came the preparations for the funeral. to choose the coffin. the type of funeral. the shifu. his photos. etc etc. 2 busy days. and i didnt manage to study for my first exam paper the next day hence i took mc. :( nobody would be in the mood.

WHAT A BAD YEAR. HMPF. :(:(:(

and boyf went overseas on the 21/221109 and i have to bear all the pain myself. especially the final day which my uncle will be here. because he was the youngest uncle, only the cousins and i can do the rituals for him, and as well as when he was going to be cremated. he had 2 big houses. several cars, and alot of things. the shifu said he came back the last 2 days. just looking at us from a distance. i wonder what he looks like. and is he enjoying life now? oh and i bought some 4d and manage to strike a $10

exams on the 19, 20, 24, 25, 261109 and 021209.
it was difficult for me to study for my papers during the funeral too.
i want to do my last bit for my uncle and fold the joss paper for him too.
but anyway i did use the days before exams to pia finish the revision. :(
results out TOMORROW OMG. SIANS!

R.I.P

261109
met boyf after about 8 days not seeing him. and we went to eat carl's junior yumyumyum!

271109
watched A Christmas Carol! and errrr i cannot remember hee.

301109
I'm finally an aunt! Kaelynn Teo Xiyuan was born 3.56kg at 2.29pm. cousin actually messaged me in the morning that her waterbag burst. so i was all excited at 6am waking my siblings up. but we only managed to see her after 4pm. She celebrated her first month on the 261209. PICTURESSS!

021209
supposed to go mambo with spms people. but it was cancelled. it was also my sister's band concert. and i brought boyf who bought gourmet bakkwa for me and my sister yumyum love! and brother and I each bought flowers for her too! our whole familywent with boyf and 2 aunts (:
then we went to eat at novena. the horfun damn nice one!

041209
dinner with boyf. cant remember details haha

051209
miss anne victor's wedding! attended her church ceremony with jiaci, yiteng, yihui, meihung. no pictures for now though. after that went to eat dinner with boyf, km and yl @ katong's steamboat. not bad! alot of meatballs i love!

081209
attended jean's 21st birthday party! alvlee came to fetch me then we went to ants house. nua a little before setting off to fetch ashton. and bought a cake for alvlim because it was his actual birthday but he didnt came to the party! ($@_!) ahahahahah jean's birthday cake was $500 though (woah!) from one caramel @ the cathay. we bought jean a ipod nano because it was on her wish list but too bad the red one must be ordered :/ i wanted the red one too! hahaha.
great foooooooood! (my family always order from neogarden also hahaha) HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

091209
was supposed to have a hall mambo party. dad sent me to mambo and i met alvlee alvyeo and weekeat. the rest were supposed to come from hall. so we bought a 1-for-1 jug of long island tea first. then just before midnight the offer will be off. so we bought 2 more jugs. (= 4jugs!) but alas the rest of them pangsehed and the 4 of us have to drink! then wk bought another jug after that. imagine 4 people 7 jugs. and 2 drivers. hahahahahaha. omg. lucky alv passed the breath test thingy. and he sent me home

101209
movie with boyf. either princess and the frog or feng yun II. but feng yun II's review was not that good so i asked to watch the former. the princess was different from the rest. but i love fairytales! heee! i actually rewatched CINDERELLA! because it's my favourite. i love the animals. heee.

141209
simple dinner for our 8th month because it was late and the place we wanted to eat at close already. so my next craving was KFC. and we went to eat just that! and oh ya boyf withdrew $50 and forgot to take it. damnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn! i was whining about course registration. :S

151209
guides annual xmas dinnner! without sandra, clara and huii! met up with emm&jean then we went to find shaomin @ cottonon. wanru came and we went to The Vines at novena to meet val and zh! alot of dishes and presents from wr emm and zh! chatted till the shop closed man.

161209
ASTRO xmas dinner supposedly, but there was only darwis, ss, daryl, lionel, eileen&boyf and rabnick. went to eat tauhuey after that before we go home. daryl's in US now hope he has settled down already! C 6 months will pass soon ok!

18-201209
refugees' trip and boyf's gone again. :(

211209
HAPPY 20th BIRTHDAY TO ME! I'm finally 20! (hit the big 2 club)
but my parents and sister are flying to HK! and will only be back on christmas!
booo but there's always the love in the air. heee.

woke up super early and met love at 9am.
went to eat MAC BREAKFAST. omg i finally woke up to eat mac breakfast.
missed the hotcakes for so long already!
then we went to the ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
one of the things we always wanted to do together for months!
free admission for me becuase it's my birthday! and they also gave me a free scoop of B&J ice cream yummmmmmmmm mans!
lunch was another of my craving. Teppanyaki! omg damn long never eat this! since the one @ junction 8 closed? the tao gei damn damn nice! superduperuber shioks!

after washing up, we made our way to amk hub to watch AVATAR in 3D (he hates watching 3D) but huiyen likes so never mind! heee. after the show we went to buy my favourite cake from pines garden! lycheemartini and baileyschoc and coffee! (blackforest how) bought home and enjoyed the cake super yummyyummy! finally opened my present (which i hadnt wanted to touch/hold in case i know what it is, and in case the element of surprise is missing). the wrapper's from prints and filled with heart shapes. so pretttty i like! and he bought me a HOLGA! with fish eye lens! wooohooooooooooooo i like i like. but haven tried it out yet.
THANKS FOR A WONDERFUL WONDERFUL 20th BIRTHDAY! doing all the things i want to do and eating all the things i want to eat.

241209-251209
refugees xmas party at ss's house! no need to bake cheesecake because there was too much food already. so i prepared some honeyjoys and waited for boyf to come fetch me. bought a burberry weekend perfume for my intended gift exchange recipient. we already picked names prior to the party haha. arrived with potato salad and logcake as well. received xmas hats and also cookies! very nice!

started eating there was A LOT OF FOOD! and then we played the newspaper game, the theme games as well as the duckyfuzz/fuzzyduck game. damn funny! then it was gift exchange. I LOST MY ELEMENT OF SURPRISE because boyf told me that shuzhan picked me. and i picked him hahahaha. what are the chances man (: he got me a pair of sony earphones! :D

251209

met up with daigugu and my brother and we went to eat some japanese buffet thingy at united square. LOTS OF SASHIMI! and barbecued meat. hahahaha woohooo!

then we went to vivo and my brother was deciding between XBOX and PS3. either one can play FF13. and he was undecided. was the blu-ray thing impt? xbox can borrow game from friend etc. PS3 was out of stock. but rock band set for xbox was going at half price $199 with two rockband games (one is the normal the other is the beatle) and there was a xmas promo for xbox too so in the end he bought there.

and i was undecided between ixus 100is and ixus 120is. christine's selling RED ixus 100is @ $350 (retail $419) but it's 3x zoom. 12.1 mp no wide angle. ixus 120is was small. $499. 4x zoom. 12.1mp wide angle 28cm. but i found that the ixus 120is was too small. and my aunt said i should just pay $50 more to get ixus 200is. slightly bigger but 5x zoom. 12.1mp and 24cm wide angle. hahahah @ $549. then i was choosing between purple and gold (IN THE END THIS WAS BROWN WHEN I SAW THE WARRANTY CARD) didnt like blue and silver was plain. but purple was too bright i felt. so i liked the gold. (this was the dummy) the REAL one was more brown. damn! but never mind NEW CAMERA. the auto mode damn zais~! i likemy new camera! so clever! :D:D:D:D

261209
HAPPY 23rd BIRTHDAY TO MY BROTHER!:D

watched the interrefugees match at tampines safra. we were late in meetng them for breakfast but arrived early at the field. haha. the two teams were gearing up and refused to talk to each other. very funnnny. hahah i wanted to sit in the middle and be everybody's friends. team 1 won 4-2.

ate lunch at tm's food court before heading home to go over to boonlay for kaelynn's full month party. after eating and sitting around, the adults decided to go to grandma's house to play mj whilst i brought the kids to toapayoh cinema to watch ALVIN&THE CHIPMUNKS! (ALL THE SINGLE......) then brought them home to play rockband!

my birthday pictures are not with me yet. next post will be zooooo maybe. haha

boyf give me picture leh!

this is a picture quite heavy post. thanks for reading till here.

im long winded. i admit. hahahaha.

if im free. i'll do a 2009 post.

but i might not be.

havent even start packing man! hahahahah

im flying to london this saturday to meet clara and huii! then we will go to paris together. omg cant wait so fun! it's a short short trip! 2nd-11th jan. i'll miss first day of school though! HEEEE!
but i'll be flying alone omg. hahaha free ticket. checked. free accom at london. checked. coachsurf in paris. checked. saveeee alot! happyhappy!

and i'll miss you! when im back we are 9th! wheee!

DAMN results in 6 minutes! and. school's reopening! FML!

WHERE DARE?!

2009-11-04T18:53:00.003+08:00

100+ missed calls.
extremely sweet words.
over and done with and hopefully no such pain will come again.

at least the root of the problem has been removed.
and the picture doesnt even have to fizzle and hide at the small top right corner anymore.
because the picture, if i ever have to think about it, is a disturbing sight.
heeee.

should have gone into the account earlier.
but otherwise, i barely have time to emo anymore.
we barely have time together.
better be contented with what we have.

was angry over i-forgot-what. and i left yishun and insisted i go home myself.
he took the carkeys his handphone and his wallet (without his ez ilnk)
but i walked towards the mrt station. poor dude, scantily clad in singlet and shorts, have to follow me.
paid cash to train with me. and after much negotiation and coaxing.
he walked home with me and eventually cabbed home which i felt damn guilty.
but it started raining and we kinda just walked in the rain. (:
remembered those times in HK.
where it was just me and him.

and on some days recalled about how sweet he was when i went to genting with emmeline.
heeeee/ and smiled silly-ly to myself as usual.

went to visit my uncle at pek san ting on saturday. it's been 100 days since he passed away.
looking at his picture brought back sadness. and it still hasnt got to us that he has gone.
went home sleep. then met boyf to watch Julie & Julia. very nice show. i like how the story flowed and everything and it showed different aspects of things. and boyf thinks he's similar to the girl. who has passion for what she likes and chasing after their dreams.

finally met giap after donkey years. and we watched the liverpool match together that hmm; was quite screwed. then boyf sent me home after everything (:

went to pek san ting again. this time for chong yang, to pay respect to all other relatives.
then dinner with my cousin's in law cousin's family. sec 4 girl. rich family.
daddy wants to ask my brother especially about university stuff. medicine student wanna be.
dinner at crystal jade and then ice cream at haagen daaz (where we spent 120+ for 5 ice cream)
DAMN RICH. even have to take photo. hahaha/ and i bathed like 4 times!

spent monday at home with sister and mum. practically slept the whole day away. so tired. haha.
boyf's first day at work. tiring day i guess.

went back to hall to do project with willard. saw alot of people and caught up with like alvin they all. then went to find boyf at his office there. we went to marina square for dinner. after walking around finally settled on kenny rogers. yummy yummy but i was darn full after that. shopped for shirts with boyf after that. then he sent me home.

my workaholic boyfriend ends work at 530 supposedly, but he finishes at 630 everyday! from day 1-3. maybe he has alot of things to learn? but danggg. he barely has time to msg me. and he says lunch time is from 12-1pm (but his colleagues start working at 1240) madness. then he'll be tired at night (i understand i slept at 9pm on my first day of work at canon). and when we meet. it'll be after work. short time. no more time to throw tantrums at him. hahaha. every second is precious. (:

oh and on that day i had a sister talk with duh my sister. and we started 发ing 花痴 about the people we were in love with, so much so that when we were lying in bed, we will start to giggle occasionally. madness.

and "where dare" has become my favourite phrase. (:

boyf looks good in shirt.
i like.
#1.2.3.4 has been chosen with me!

and we are going to have a date this saturday.
THEME: SCHOOL UNIFORM.
fun fun fun LOVE!

FETISH FOR GREEN LOVE!

2009-10-25T02:23:00.008+08:00

haha. i wanted to try going for ALL my lessons for the week.
but i failed. (and anyway monday was a holiday).
but i tried for wednesday thursday and friday. (ITS SO FREAKING TIRING)
and i wondered why i didnt go for all my lessons for the past 10 weeks.
*notice i skipped tuesday. and stayed at home to rest though i didnt do anything.

shagged out.
hahaha.
BAD ATTITUDE.
BAD BAD. :(

my friends study so hard. but they still fail.
so what's the point of studying. danggg!

21102009
RANTINGS!

anyway met my pregnant cousin at jookoon so that i can pei her to my aunt's house for dinner since her husband will be in town. so we sat at the two people kinda seats. and i got her to sit at the priority seat. at some station like commonwealth or something, there was this woman standing in front of her. wearing a dress and kitten heels. and she had a bulge at her stomach area. it's like big and rounded. not the fatty layers kind. so i asked my cousin if she thinks that woman was pregnant, which my cousin say maybe not since she's in heels. my cousin and i were playing MJ on my ipod touch, but i couldnt bear just staring at the stomach in front of her. so i stood up, WANTING TO GIVE MY SEAT UP TO HER. but she didnt look at the seat at all. and as immediately as i stood up, this young lady in her 20s sat down! PLEASE LA. DO YOU THINK I WLL GIVE UP MY SEAT TO YOU. AND STAND AND LOOK AT MY COUSIN. so i stared at her (another passenger did so too and she shook her head) and that stupid woman pretended to sleep. WTF. I WAS SO PISSED. i have to stand all the way. SHE DIDNT EVEN HAVE THE COURTESY TO AT LEAST OFFER TO THE INTENDED RECIPIENT OF THE SEAT OR TO RETURN THE SEAT BACK TO ME. STUPID!

so never mind, then my heavily pregnant forewarned me not to make noise if people dont give up seat to her. what the hell right. how can. but she said it's damn embarassing one. so never mind. at raffles place, there wasnt alot of people boarding towards toapayoh. this stupid NSman playing a RED psp just walked in front of my cousin and took the priority seat with no intention of giving it up. so my cousin asked me to dont stare at him ahhh. and i replied (a tad too loudly i guess) "i wished some other kind soul will speak up for me" and this guy just in front of me turned around and kinda smiled, feeling a bit guilty i guess. but anyway i took a picture of the boy, jokingly wanting to STOMP him. hahahahahah! of course i didnt. too much effort. heee.
but i was PISSED! STUPID PEOPLE! :@:@

22102009
went on a date. boyf was supposed to reached at 530pm, or die. and he reached at 533pm. but never mind, since our clock were not synchronized and i ended class early. so we went to the cathay to watch The Hurt Locker. war show. and hmm i didnt really understand the army stuff. and i asked boyf soo many questions about all the army things during the movie. (at some point i was yawning and tearing, and feeling unhappy i dont understand anything) but im thankful he didnt felt irritated. and was so enthusiastic in sharing his information, he even wanted to draw me the chart of army ranks after that. but some parts of the movie were really nice, though others were boring. :// there was this part i thought the lead actor died i cried. and boyf asked why i cry, i said I THOUGHT HE DIED. i think that must have sounded really silly~~

astons for dinner and we were the LAST of the LAST to leave. the movie ended about 930 haha. so we stood at the door initially waiting to be served and apparently though there were 3 supervisors at the counter, none of them bothered about us, until one of the waitresses came to serve us. boyf began muttering about singapore's enterprises,etc etc. service. etc etc. hahahahaha! then we walked to orchard before training home cos im too full. -burps-

23102009
i like seeing guys in army uniform. (not those botak botak head ones)
i just need spiky hair and army uniform. it makes the guys look good.
maybe the army shouldnt enfore the botak hairstyle?
hahaha read: ow in spiky hair and ncc uniform. boyf in spiky hair and army uniform.

but im really thankful, boyf is old enough to be the LAST batch of the OLD uniform.
the new uniform is TOO UGLY TOO PIXELATED. I DONT LIKE.
wanru will agree with me. we LOVE the OLD uniform (:
but ok my fetish not as strong as hers. :D
but anyway since ive never dated a guy who's in army when we are together,
i'll not know the misery of the guys in camp and the girlfriends who are outside.
not till reservice at least. :(
but at least i got the honour of a boyf in army uniform waiting for me to end class. :D
happppppppppppppppy.
but you know all the rules and regulations of no PDA in uniform.
damn.

24102009
brother brought the family out to veerasamy road for dim sum. not bad. cheaper than geylang's 126

$47 for 4 of us. but we ate about 24 dishes of stuff. yum look at the portuguese tarts. yum! my favourite.
am missing the hongkong egg tarts boyf and i love! (:

random sharing. this picture was taken at a condo in upper east coast road.
saw it at night. felt a bit spooked. so there are "dead slow children playing" ahead? ://

(editted)
ok after i published i went to read the post right.
i realised this post is so armyish. i swear the tite's solely for the love; and not shared by the first army BOY. and i realised that the selfish guy who didnt give up the seat to my cousin totally fits the "(NOT THOSE BOTAK BOTAK ONES)part" but i was saying in general when i typed that out. not shooting at the poor dude. i think you guys will think i did it on purpose but seriously, no. and even The Hurt Locker picture looks so army. tsks!

tsktsk

2009-10-22T15:09:00.003+08:00

ripped this off a friend's friend's blog.

hahaha. but it only applies for ONS? i also duno.

after 2 hours break in school,

slacking in the comp lab,

blog surfing and facebooking.

im going to class now!

and watching THE HURT LOCKER later.

boyf's favourite kind of shows. hmmmm.

army did him no good.

hahahaha.

"SENSITIVE TO MY FEELINGS"

2009-10-19T21:52:00.037+08:00

hahaha. i tweet alot more than i blog i know.

but never mind la. im having alot of fun. or NOT? heeeee.

so just an update of the past one month. for my own future reference.

might be boring. i mean not might. IT WILL BE! ://

heck.

19092009

went to tried out the bridesmaid dresses for my cousin's wedding. but on the way back, boyf said he's right outside my house. we dont usually meet on saturdays you see. so he was trying to plan a surprise. so sillly. and failed. his surprises fail as often as mine do HAHA lousyyy la. :(

20092009-21092009

went to collect wedding cakes from my cousin at her grandma's house in toa payoh. the whole family tree gathered there in the morning to wait for the cakes to arrive. and there's buffet. then they headed over to my uncle's house for mahjong. dad then sent me to the airport at night to send clara off to london! :( so the girl's been there for almost a month. and i hope she's adapting well. she's gonna be there for years. and life will be different without her! her house's usually the place for our guide's stayover you see. and those christmas dinners. dangg. so we celebrated clara's birthday at the airport too when the clock struck midnight. this silly girl had her birthday in Singapore, in midair, in Doha and in London. haha how cool. her friends celebrated her birthday for her in front of mcCafe, so thinking we shall not buy her the same cake we went to i think TCC or something to get her her favourite cheesecake. but we too gey ghiang. turns out they bought the exact same cake. hahaha that's why we are all her friends. (: after she went off, half of us stayed to study in the airport, and sandra wanru and I stayed with them to chill out a little and catch up after which wans sent me home at like 4am? (:

21092009
sister was itching all over and had red spots appearing everywhere especially her face. then apparently she didnt felt well in the middle of the night. (and i was sound asleep), well the story goes that she had a stomachache. and she went to my parent's room to "whine" and almost passed out at the door. but that morning 6 plus i was supposed to wake up to go to school. but i didnt see her in bed and i thought she left for school already. i didnt wake up eventually. (:S)and at 8plus i received calls from dad and my sister. and i thought omg maybe my sister wasnt feeling well in school and i was to go and pick her up. turns out she's already hospitalised at about 3 plus am when i was asleep. and my parents are with her. :////

22092009

his uncle's family would like to have dinner with me. so there we were, meeting at hougang mrt after i went to visit my sister for a short while at the hospital. isolated ward with aircon cos it was suspected chicken pox (but she had chix pox before, and even the snake thing) - in fact till today it's still unknown what it is. ok anyway dinner was at defu lane. some heaven restaurant or somethingi cant remember what. but my family always go there to eat crab. whenever some big event or tio 4d. hahaa. the cream crab is damn nice one! but ok so the aunt ordered some 6-7 course meal with dessert and shark fin. yummmyumm! then headed to the aunt's house cos boyf needs to tuition his cousin.

24092009

retarded day. thought class was at 1130am. reached at 1145am to find a different teacher and everyone's head staring down at some paper. and i thought SHIT there's a quiz? and i didnt study? so i went to take mc. cos my friend didnt reply me. in the end 1230 my friend called me and said sorry i was in lesson. then i was like THERE WAS A QUIZ? and she said what talking me. because my lesson's at 1230 actually so stupid man!

25092009

was dating day! :D

boyf came to boonlay to meet me, then we made our way down to cineleisure to watch phobia 2!

5 short stories. alot of fear. that's what boyfriends are for. HAHA. then we went over to ion Orchard to eat swensen's ice cream buffet. 1-for-1! i remember feeling damn uncomfortable. we only ate like 1 bowl of ice cream+share a few slices of different cakes. and i felt really terrible. i think we should eat some proper food. so we went to his house for some proper food. finally had the chance to eat the ice cream buffet. but im disappointed at our ability to eat ice cream. hahahaha!

28092009

i think recess week started. but anyway was supposed to start studying, so we went to where we used to date (ie changi airport) to study hahahaha. that time was exam period you see. lol. so after studying the whole day, i went over to T3 to send shirlyn off. she went to london also! the whole world's flying to london as you can see. hahaa. then went back to T1 to go home with the boyf. he had a late dinner because of me. so everybody please awwwwwwwwww.

29092009

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WANS! hope you enjoyed your 20th birthday yea? :D

went to eat with boyf's mum and boyf at yishun's seoul garden. we ate alot of meat. and seoul garden has more variety of food now. (especially ready food) and the drinks and ice cream and dessert, etc. it's so secondary school. recalling those days where we used to hang out at seoul garden's to celebrate birthdays especially. within budget ma hahahaha

01102009

was at home and started dressing the dog up with different random things i can find in one of the drawers.

haha was really bored from studying as you can see.

HAPPY CHILDREN'S DAY! and i didnt celebrate it this year :(

02102009

went to tiong bahru market to satisfy my cheese chicken chop craving! C^4. shit it's like damn damn yummmmy la *finger licking good ok* plus boyf bought lor mee and carrot cake. alot of food man! but craving satisfied. thumbsup! XD

night cycling with the refugees! organised by whoelse. hahahaha. so boyf drove me and his brother down after dinner. and we went to book 12 bicycles. apparently it's kinda cool now. cos you dont have to wait till a certain time before you return the bike. they give you chain so that you can tie up to the bars outside. haha. good. i didnt bring camera. once bitten twice shy. that lesson cost $600 hahah. but anyway we went a 30km ride. from east coast to changi to changi village to tampines to bedok back to east coast. ate at changi v. supposedly bedok85(which is closed) and some random prata place off siglap. boyf sent me home at about 3/4am. and he went home. and he had to wake up for some entrepreneur's talk at 8am. bad planning on his part. but nvm not i wake up HEE :D

04102009

ah han's wedding! had to wake up super early and arrived at my cousin's grandma's place. was one of the bridesmaid. so we tekkan the groom and his brothers with 酸甜苦辣. 1) super concentrated lime juice 2) one whole big packet of marshmellow (which old people dont like you see HAHA) 3) bitter tea 4) bread and mooncake with wasabi! easssy peassy. so some controversy on the money thing but nvm. then headed to the groom's place at hougang. ate buffet. took pictures. change clothes. and returned to the toa payoh place. buffet again. then went home to sleep. before going to CP to do our hair and make up. was abit late for reception. blackangryfaces everywhere including mine. but nvm nvm wedding should be happy. but idc. HAHA.

06102009-10102009

went to swim. after that boyf and i went to meet kenmun for lunch at yishun. the 2 unemployeds. who are both damn sian about slacking at home already. hahaha jiayou to the two of them to find a job soon!

so, got pissed about "planning about my own future" and next thing you know, he got ignored for the next few days. and we talked about this before lo! tsktsks! then he came bl to fetch me on the 9th. but the "lance>me" issue appeared (albeit misinterpreted by me) and boyf has to pacify me.

14092009

HAPPY 6th MONTH-NIVERSARY :):)

the most memorable, no pictures taken month.

the supposedly most important one since it marks half a year.

so was upset cos somebody came home damn late the previous previous night.

and so we didnt talk on the phone.

didnt want to meet him on the 14th, but he insisted and i had to return him something.

so met him, and we went to catch (500)days of summer.

it was supposed to be a comedy according to the review. but we laughed maybe only 3/4 times.

hahaha it was instead like a LOVELOVE story. which a few scenes were totally talking about our situation kinda thing. hahaha so deja vu.

and before that i was still throwing tantrums.and we were a few minutes late so i walked up the escalator to the cinema and I FELL! I FREAKING FELL ON THE ESCALATOR. so there he was holding the popcorn and a cup of drink. and i was holding my drink. damn. i fell! and he was thinking if he should throw away the popcorn and drink as per drama. but i picked myself (and my 90% filled drink) up and he came to hold the cup for me and asked me to sit down somewhere. but i said no let's go to the cinema. in fact he thought i will cry. or be scared. adrenaline rush. but no i didnt. so during the show i was examining my wounds. damn pain! a few holes on my ankle part. scratches across my thighs (but my leggings were amazingly not torn!) and i only found bloodied gladiators after the movie ended. hahaha toe was bleeding. my leg has a big patch of blue black now though. and it hurt really bad that day.

so unhappiness ensued. and we were supposed to go eat fishnco. but instead i insisted on going home. and on myself. alot of emo shit. walked around. myself. then him following me. then mos burger feast which he ate and ta baoed my share for me cos i refused to eat. more emo drama. and eventually we made up. and we went back to mos to eat my food. and till now the phrase still resonates in his head it's just kinda cute of him to keep repeating it to himself. (: and he sent me home. (because no matter what, IM STILL INJURED RIGHT)

15102009

dinner with aunt, cousin&cousin in law, sister and parents at some novena shop, they call it FEI PO. hahhaa. cos of the chef. it has really nice prawn paste chicken. haha!

16102009

we prepared dinner. and we cooked dishes like pork chop, brocolli, sardine, etc, basically food that i like. hahahah nicenicenice. cooking is so eerrrrr tiring, hot? haha tedious? dang!

17102009

i went back to school for class from 1030-6pm despite it being deepavali. apparently after reaching school then maxton told me lecture will be recorded cos got complaints that the prof's holding make uplecture on a public holiday! really damn stupid and the email was sent out only in the morning. who will check email so early right! stupid stupid stupid!

18102009

watched the refugee's soccer match and they won 2-1! boyf suffered from a damn bad internal ache. from duno where. and was almost brought to the hospital until he recovered after a short nap. but he was in so much pain. his dad thought it was like appendicitis(sp?) or something. but in the end we still made it to the refugees postmatch chill out barbecue at soon's place. we started the barbecue at 4pm the sun was scorching hot and i helped by cutting the chicken chop which was damn tough and irritating i have a blister on my finger because of the scissors. eew to touching raw meat again! but at least i got to know more people and celebrated allister's birthday too! hmm they got funny culture. first couples take picture with the birthday boy. then all the single dudes. then everyone. then the girls. haha 8 people played winning eleven at the same time just seemed so new. hahaa and messy and loud! and these guys just played real soccer in the morning and having fun with virtual soccer at night. whilst some of the WAGS played pool and im really rusty. after that it's just chilling aside beside the boyf. HOME SWEET HOME at 11pm!

19102009

i attended my aunt's cat's cremation today. it was hmm interesting. the first corpse ive touched though i attended a couple of funerals already. cold and hard. and small furnace. can still see the smoke coming out of the furnace. got joss papers and joss sticks. got a space in the crematorium. and his favourite food (ie drumsticks, milk, bread, drink, etc) got flowers too! like a miniature human funeral. hmm rest in peace ah ang. he lived for 10 years 10 months. apparently longer than what a cat is supposed to live for. the uncle said he led a good life and had good care. i think so too. during CNY there's one chicken and he eats the drum stick and he eats abalone too!

so on average i spend half the week with my boyf actually. hahaa.

but each time only a few hours la.

really enjoy the times with him.

it's like i emo less when im with him.

hahahahahahahahahahahaha.

i feel so bad actually.

those love and protection.

those patience and comfort.

those shoulders and hands.

"the whole outside world can be pearls, like me,

but im the only pearl that's protected by a strong oyster like him"

:D:D

and now tell me, do we all love ice cream?

especially to the boyf. haha :PP

and and who's better at dai dee?

me or you!

MEE OF COURSE HAHA.

and and and who's better at 耍赖-ing

HAHA,

it's still ME LEH.

you gave me alot of chances. i gave you none.
ooops!

ok im going to sleep now (:

if only you were here.

and a picture from justina's 21st!
it was supposed to be a themed party.
HATS!
but i seemed to be the only one suited to the theme! haha

justina i support you eh!

double pms-ed//////

2009-09-17T00:40:00.002+08:00

our love's backlogged.
it remains at the times before we went to hong kong.
it's been two months already.
better start updating the book.
and not be lazy! hahahahhaha!
if not the tantrums will just continue and continue.
until one day the boyfriend explodes.
(more probably implodes)

i think it's coming again.
im damn sian!
wtf is wrong!

but as much as i hate to agree that it's me doing all my monkey business.
(wanru always scold me for this)
and i always 没事找事做 (actually got 45 questions of probability tutorial questions waiting to do)
i still have to say 25% is my fault.
HAHAH DONT CARE DONT CARE.
no need to share the blame equally one.

im most apologetic, for being impulsive.
and messaging him when you refused to watch it with me.
second apology is for the fact that i shouldnt control you in this manner,
when everyone else (who's like you) does it.
i shouldnt impose my ideas on you,
just like you shouldnt impose on theories on me.
so i shall not care about you doing whatever anymore.
you want to cycle you go cycle lo.
you want to do this or that or what, then go ahead.

*mumbles*
dont know who says i can make demands.
but when i do, it doesnt get met.
so what's the point of me making demands.
never mind.
*mumbles finish*

and the worst thing is i went to school for freaking NOTHING today.
stupid lecturer. MC dont know how to say earlier ah.
his stupid colleague who helped him passed the message.
i bet my lecturer told you long ago (this morning)
you could have given an earlier notice.
i was on webmail and edventure this morning ok!
tsks!
pissed.
waste my time.

it's thursday again tomorrow!
omg
week 6 is coming to an end.
i tell you i have no freaking idea whatever im studying.
ah freak.
this is bad.

ive got so many movies i want to watch.
especially phobia 2! :D people date me out to watch this ok! (:

just had a very busy weekend.
was supposed to work at IT show but i didnt in the end too busy!
sorry hall 11 never go DND. but i cancelled work last minute!
so friday was spent playing overnight mahjong with meiding, alex and tianhee.
went home at 7 plus. ate breakfast with the family.
went to sleep at 10am. relatives came over from 12pm onwards.
but i was asleep till 4plus pm then they woke me up.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY! he's 50 years old. OLD and NAGGY. tsks.
but hope you like your GPS. and prolly your first big party. hahahaha.
brother sent me to clara's house for a stayover at midnight with the guides!
slacked and watched movie and talked and ate till 5plus am./
i was the survivor again, as usual. tsks! SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK!
woke up at 7 plus am, (2HOURS later)... went to khatib mrt to meet sf and st.
and they were late. hmpfs! watched them played a 0-0 soccer league match.
boooo! had fun gossipping with steph though. HIAKHIAK. went to gran's place to sleep for an hour plus after that before going home to prepare to go to justina's 21st.
YUPPS HAPPY BIRTHDAY JUSTINA! hope you like your bicycle. and it's tough organising a party aint it. but nice cake there! :D stayed till dadddy came to pick me up. (it was almost another stayover, but lucky 05 didnt stay) heeee.

HAPPY 5th MONTH on the monday.
went to watch BLOODTIES! my idea! HAHAHHA i thought it was horror.
but it was supernatural thriller hmmmm. not exactly what i planned to watch.
but nonetheless it was a nice show! :D next to robertson quay (pronounced as KEY), for some japanese food. interesting concept. you can actually borrow books home from the store. basically based on trust within their japanese community. its a japanese bookstore cum eatery. nice food there and quite affordable. :DDDD was supposed to go to swensen's ice cream buffet. but we were quite full so walked to city hall supposedly to get TOM'S PALETTE ICE CREAM. halfway through. was unhappy with bf refusing to watch phobia 2. so i 出 stunt and messaged ow. AHHAHA. wrong of me i admit i admit. but i dont care la. lousy boy! but after much easy cajoling, we went ahead to buy tom's palette ice cream home for my siblings!
but no more APPLE PIE flavour.

i bet nobody read till here.
but im just trying to wait for my stuff to finish printing by the laopok printer.
if you did, thank you very much.
for wanting to know about my unupdated life.

ok done. go facebook to see pictures and videos of my dog dog ok. :D
oreo's damn cute laaaaaaaaaa.
i swear you guys will love him.

byebye guys!
please ask me to start studying.
or ask me out to study ok.
love love.

somebody's in lalaland already
not i want to complain. but dont know which idiot says he wont sleep till i answer the phone.
stupid.
hmpf!
okay this post is full of nonsense and broken english.
so sorry hahah!

2009-09-01T00:16:00.002+08:00

is pissed.
is angry.
is upset.
is sad.
is disappointed.
is negative.

dont see a point in whatever we are talking.
neither in why im kicking such a big fuss.

i know pms plays a part.
i know im tired already.
i know i miss you.

it's not jealousy.
because there's nothing to be jealous about.
it's more of.
i dont know.
maybe i didnt get your full attention.

maybe just throwing tantrums for the sake of doing so.

random ramblings.

2009-08-11T12:50:00.003+08:00

goodness gracious. it's been 2 months since i blogged.

and i was supposed to blog about some past events.

(which let's just forget it).

and in july, i went to hongkong with boyfriend and friends for 10 days 9 nights.

came back to the loss of an uncle.

union camp after the funeral.

and hall camp after union camp.

there was only like 2 days freeeeeee of activities.

and now school has reopened.

dang.

im just bored in lecture. hahahahahahaha.

bye guys!

i didnt get hall so i have to start travelling from toa payoh to boonlay.

good thing? managed to find someone to fetch me on monday,tuesday and wednesday.

thursday and friday late class so never mind.

ok tired.

3 hours of sleep.

incoherent rambling.

whatever~

maxton's feeling hot.

quizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzes!

2009-06-15T17:40:00.003+08:00

i know im supposed to blog about alot of things.
but there's really so darn many that,
let's forget it.
lol

my legs are shagged from it show.
but just glad im doing payment instead of those lurking outside. hiakhiak.

did a quiz. mmmm.

Your view on yourself:

You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:

You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

Here is the analysis:

You've got great self-confidence and you're full of charm. Most guys who get to know you will be attracted to you. You are far from sweet and proper; your intriguing personality fascinates them. Most guys find it easy to fall for a girl like you.
You really care about other people's feelings and are quite serious about the issues that affect your life. You are sincere, and your concern for the well-being of others makes many people want to be your friend.
You strictly follow rules, and you expect other people to be the same as well. People can get tired of you easily, as you can make them feel a little guilty about themselves. You always make decisions on your own, and can be dismissive of other people's advice. You like to be the leader in groups, but can forget to be concerned about the people you are with.
Guys see you as being a thinker and a careful person. They will be really attracted to this quality in you, but you need to learn to speak your mind, otherwise people will find you too shy and quiet. Learn to relax and lighten up--it's okay to have fun sometimes. When you learn to develop your fun-loving side, guys are going to flock to your side.
Your boyfriend believes that you are a strong and independent person. Your confidence and cheerfulness make you an attractive person to be around, but sometimes you need to pay more attention to what other people, including your boyfriend, are thinking.

You desire a love that will last forever. You are quite serious about finding this type of love, and that's why you think carefully about the men that you meet before deciding whether you could really love them. You don't just develop a crush on someone overnight: you look at a person's personality and other aspects of their life before deciding to form an attachment. If a guy doesn't meet your expectations, you would rather be alone. Your love has to be perfect. Be careful though, you could be missing out on some worthy relationships because your standards are so high.

Kind and Gentle

Your kindness is your charm - you are also gentle and sweet. Everybody likes to be around people with your personality. Like a psychologist, people like to talk to you to discuss their problems because you are proper and discrete, as well as confident. You look mature and people respect you. People with this kind of character are few and far between.

You love your friends very much - so much so that it's actually quite a worry. You may not be able to cope very well when you do lose somebody's friendship. You are a very sensitive and fragile person, and are therefore likely to get upset easily. You care for your friends and are willing to do anything that they ask you to do. Sometimes this can make your friends think that you are a bit of a nuisance. Nevertheless, people do really love you because your highest priority is your friends.

bob the builder BOOOYOU!

2009-06-05T02:29:00.004+08:00

i will update this space soon.

but most importantly!
bob the blob 0-1 bob the builder. you are supposed to build, not break!

have about 2 weeks of stuff to update. teeheehee! will throw in some pictures here and there when i do so.

just to remind myself :
monday: tennis/swim/mahjong/islandcreamery with the youngblood.
tuesday: dimsum buffet with sf, yl, etc/shop at borders
wednesday: rollerblading!/popeyes/CL finals
thursday: yishunlaksa/terminator
friday: ttsh/badminton/entertainment mac
saturday,sunday,monday: genting
tuesday: swim 60 laps / ttsh
wednesday: swim 66 laps/sf's house for dinner/mVa
thursday: swim 30 laps/casuarina for dinner

tsktsktsk.

passion.ate.

2009-05-24T23:16:00.003+08:00

me.

21/5
met at airport before going down to eat xiaolongbao at crystal jade.
watched night at the museum 2.
pretty funny movie. i'll recommend people to watch! :D
(next up, terminator and monstersvsaliens)

beautiful day and night.
i know how you feel, totally.
because of our indulgence in the things we like to do.
it brings us a step nearer.
but overindulgence kills. i'll always remember.

the next few days kinda screwed up,
because of different ways of looking at the things being said.

im just a little girl.
please be patient with me.

hahahahahahahhahaa.

the feeling of raising and dropping hope sucks.
expect and expect to be disappointed.
but i know it aint your fault. (:

but this allowed me to eat with my parents and update them about my life.
pretty good! haha.

23/5
met astro! for lunch at Ministry of Food.
before we walked to Marina Square (wanting to eat at changing appetites)
but ended up at Secret Recipes where we all ate cake. yumyum.
grow fat. tsks!

down to smu. slack around. and being there just to be there.
and spending time together.

met the guides at emmeline's place
(jean, clara, emmeline, valerie, huihui, wanru and I)
they were watching Carrie. apparently some scary movie.
but when i reached they all kept fast forwarding.
and i am watching the last half an hour of the show.
which was the climax part of the movie.
we were laughing at most parts despite it being a scary movie.
it's like last time low budget movie.
it's just damn funny!
screamed at like maybe 2/3 scenes.

"where's the mother!
*stares at screen for 30 seconds*
wanru: behind the door!!!
everyone else: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

"the hand's going to come out and grab her!
maybe to pull her in!
*girl puts hand downwards*
someone: it is going to come out!
*someone's hand pull girl's hand*
everyone: AHHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"
getting scared despite expecting it.
what the hell seriously.

val arrived when the movie ended.
and i went to the Night Safari Ben & Jerry's with wanru.
that girl passed her driving test and I'm the second person to sit the car (besides her mum!) woohoooooo!!
the girl has staff pass which entitles us to 35% discount.
shiok shiok!
i ate 2 scoops (GROW FAT AGIAN) for like maybe $5? LOL!
LOVES!

went back to emmeline's house. left huii valerie and emmeline.
we wanted to watch some mindless bimbo movie that we havent already done so.
and we chose CLUELESS, which left us really clueless.
i lasted the longest while everyone else went to eat ice cream
but eventually we abandoned the movie.
started to facebook, watch video and huii emmeline fell asleep,
whilst me and valerie just HTHT till about 630am in the morning.
and we left for home. hahaha.

exciting week ahead!
(exciting = money spending!)

monday: tennis/swim/mahjong with the youngblood.
tuesday: dimsum buffet with sf, yl, etc
wednesday: rollerblading!
thursday: terminator/ MvA!

sometimes.

2009-05-22T03:29:00.003+08:00

sometimes you forget im nineteen.
sometimes i forget what it is like to cry.
sometimes things dont go the way you want it to be.
sometimes im sorry i have to vent my frustrations on you.
sometimes i just dont feel like switching on my phone.
sometimes you just wont understand.
sometimes you feel so happy one moment, so sad the other.
sometimes you get so pekchey, you give up altogether.
sometimes i dont make you happy at all.

but most of the time,
all the time,
i do not know what i want to do/be in the future.

i know how wimpy/wussy that seems.
but i really do not know.
and the way you are asking me to find out.
it just hurts so badly.
my heart aches to know that altogether you do not understand what im going through.

when cracks appear.
it appeared once.
and it appeared a second time.
i dont want it to widen.

headaches.

慧焰第一次闹别扭leh.

2009-05-21T02:16:00.026+08:00

15/5
lunch with yl and sf at bedok interchange. the carrot cake is DAMN nice! i like! :D
finished my book at the airport. and i had a Pacific Coffee Company Hot Chocolate surprise. yumyumyum! though i'd prefer COFFEE BLENDED next time thankyouverymuch (:
hee. thanks for holding on and not letting go. it meant alot.

supperclub gathering in the evening.
safra tampines sakura again. fantastic food. even better company.
grow fat -> quoted. dang!
but i think after such a long break, everyone's stomach kinda shrank.
all cannot eat much just like me. the durian puff's GREAT! :D:D:D:D

that's lauren. she went back to US already. she was one great exchange student who integrated into our life, our culture. just to add on, her favourite drink is tehpeng. haha.

headed to ansel's place after that.
4 cars convoy. haha. drank as usual and then home sweet home.

16/5
WE ARE GOING TO THE ZOO ZOO ZOO~
HOW ABOUT YOU YOU YOU~
WONT YOU COME TOO TOO TOO?!?!

had free tickets cos my brother couldnt make it.
and dad has already gotten the tickets from the company.
so since beavan asked me to hang out with him and lauren.
might as well bring her to the zoo!

hee met at khatib(: hahaha. before cabbing into the zoo.
had the worse cup of peppermint oreo. damn sucky. and black. eeew!
some pictures of the zooo for those who hasnt been there in a million years!
(though i didnt wait for you, but i'll still go with you after exams! :D)

it began to rain and we were about done in the zoo. so we left after like 3 hours.
headed back to yishun and went to see the hall11 vs ex-andersonians soccer match.
like know quite alot of people kind? lol. hall11 win yays! 1-0
cyclist came from home to watch the match. how nice (:
and in nice hot red. with his favourite shades. hahahahahhahahahahaha.

went to giap's house then his house to watch soccer together.
and eat dinner at his house! yumyum. reminded me of the food my aunt used to cook.
home sweet home!

17/5
grandma's place. helped my mum to lose $50 lol lol.

18/5
met up with justina, huiqi, xiaobai, sarah and gillian for lunch at tiong bahru market. the food samba good~ cheesy chicken chop.

rocks to the maximum. i love cheese! justina returned to work after her 1 hour break.
and the rest of us went on to kallang leisure park.
while sarah and gillian went to ice skate, the rest of us went to watch angels and demons. just nice got the time slot when we reached.
hahahaha
it's a damn good movie please!

after that, i left for city hall (so near yet so far ):)
and went to sembawang to meet alvinlee they all for karaoke!
attendance damn good. different from the crowd we had for buffet.
most of them are from jamband, xing and strum, fantastic singers.
i thought i was at a concert. woohoo!
love their voices (:
dinner was at a restaurant at cdans sembawang.
like zi char but each dish that serves about 4 costs about $8.80.
and since it wasnt worth it to order veggie. we really had 大鱼大肉.
hahaha. crab, sharkfins, chicken, prawn, fish. hahaha.

19/5
went to swim 60 laps! and super muscle aching now please!
was like super tired after that. head bobbing up down left right.
legs like jelly.
had dinner with the family. and then we send brother off to US.

20/5
慧焰第一次闹别扭leh.
woke up on the wrong side of bed maybe.
was pmsing.
super grumpy.
maybe super hungry also.
and felt an unknown sadness.
which i tried to make it normal.
and then i was angry.
and just didnt feel like talking.
it was a BAD BAD feeling.
a BAD BAD day.
and i feel BAD.
boo! sorry you have to face this the day before a paper.
hahaha.

met up with emme, wanru, huii and sandra for dinner at emme's.
to watch American Idol Finals together! hahaha. ice cream!!!
was supposed to go butterfact. but we decided to nua instead.
and great choice indeed. save money!

on the way home and try to do some damage control.
haha forgot why i was angry in the first place.
am fine now. controlled before another outburst.
dont want it to go downhill.

4 days already.
thank god tomorrow's the last.

it has become a need;
no longer a want.
but i'll still like to give you your space.
im trying. i really am. (:

14th may.

2009-05-15T12:03:00.023+08:00

clashes too much.
it shouldnt be the same date.
it feels so wrong.

but never mind.
today i was forced to get out of my comfort zone,
or so i feel.
it was very sad. abit pissing.
and i just totally feel like crying out in front of everyone.
this business thing.
dang.

went to meet him.
before going to meet wanru, emmeline, daniel, xinwen and terry!
boys meet ladies part II!
hahahaha.
it was fun and LONG LONG LONG time no see daniel.
hahaha.
the rest pangseh again la~~

we went to eat mad jack.
supposed to meet at 7pm amk. but we only ended eating at about 830pm.
SORRY GUYS! :D:D

pictures!

14th.

2009-05-14T00:26:00.002+08:00

it feels like we've known each other for damn long.
because of all the things that i know about you.
it seems time has flew past so fast, so much.
thanks for keeping my smile there.
and being so full of assurance for me.
that i know what i need to know (as well as those that i dont need to)
and i feel what im supposed to be feeling.
and currently i feel like im the luckiest and happiest girl (:

it's a test.not.

2009-05-12T21:48:00.010+08:00

it's does not exist to be tested,
it should be nurtured to exist.
(:

following my previous post,
i brought my uncle to the doctor.
we had a long wait during noon where we went to eat lunch.
then me and my brother brought him,
a 60+ years old man to drink starbucks.
:D he said he always walk past and it smells damn nice.
but always no chance to try.
glad we brought him there to drink it anyway!
though it's just normal coffee and cost 7 times more.
but he loves it!
(my dad was commenting that he hasnt tried it before too. tsks)

went to sea expedition on saturday.
well the whole supper club didnt go.
(jean overslept too! and never go)
but glad i had giap keesiang zhiqiang zhenming etc to keep me company.
not forgetting my partner maxton!
who got screwed by me quite badly.
and hahahahhaa kena scolded.
and alot. im sorry! :D
after that most of the sea ex people went to tampines 1.

then i went to my family for second round mother's day celebration.
CRAB AT AMK. YUM YUM YUM YUM!
blackpeppercreamcrab. chillicrab. porkribs. etcetcetc.
super shiokkkkkks!

beavan's surprise celebration at midnight!
shaun and jean came to fetch me then we waited at jean's house.
maxton arrived and we set off.
was supposed to ask beavan to shaun's house to watch soccer.
but he couldnt cos he has work the next day.
so plan failed.
plus himbo broke our lighter.
and bo bian jean ask him to bring lighter and i guess beavan kinda expected our surprise from there.
so we took the lift down from 16th floor to 15th floor.
(where beavan was waiting) surprise!
so we were holding the cake and wanted to light it.
but just as we were about to do so, the lift opened at 14th floor for another couple.
hahahaha at midnight we didnt expect visitors right.
lol so quite funny.
in the end we celebrated his birthday at the void deck,
singing super softly.
but after we eat the cake,
(oh i forgot to mention it was a self decorated pandan cake with nutella, koko krunch and rainbow) HAHA.
the police arrived. lol great.
what a 22nd birthday eh beef! hahaha.
took down our particulars, asked alot of questions.
and then we went to his house instead.
pictures!

helped him to send his phone for servicing.
then chilled at starbucks to read myself before going to meet him and the rest.
maxton called and he came to find me with zirui, weiyuan, daniel and lester.
hahaha they had a meeting.
went to zi char with him, and a few of the important guys in his life.
shiok shiok! i love zi char xD though it's relatively more expensive hahah.

damn busy day today.
woke up, rained, cannot swim again.
went to ntu to fix my keyboard but they said it's working fine and thus they cant change it for me.
damn it. the E and ? spoils occasionally.
hahahah shucks!
paid my hallappfee. climbed a mountain. damn tired and saw qiyun and namkhai.
went to bishan to try to repair my loose SE flipphone and they said it's not covered under warranty. must pay $65 at least.
sian la! waste alot of time today not getting my gadgets fixed.
wanted to go and try to sell my new camera but the price offered, is like 1/7 of what i paid 2 months ago.

i want you to be happy.
dont brood!
SMIL(:
i wished i could be beside you though.

mas selamat caught!

2009-05-08T04:23:00.003+08:00

for those who haven saw CNA news. hahah!

because i blog in the morning.
actually all my blogposts are one day late.

anyway my keyboard's faulty.
'E' is semi-down and so is 'spacebar'
damn it.
and 8flags is so far away!

anyway today i went to fulfil half my craving,
of maxton's mango cheesecake.
jio-ed him to bake ytd (pangsehed the rest for tennis)
hahahahahaha.
we met up bought ingredients and went to his house.

i love thick based cheesecake.
it was one packet of digestive to one cake.
super thick. super love.
and super tedious to crush the biscuits.
we spoilt the blender after first attempt to use it to crush the biscuit.
him and his fantastic idea.

haha. we baked 4 cakes. one for me, one for him, one for him, and one for them.
someone dropped by to chit chat for 5 minutes (:
wet and gross. HAHAHA.

surprise failed again!
that time i was supposed to go find him. but just as i am about to reach, he said he's leaving, so gotta wait for him at the train station.
this time i was supposed to go find him too. but with a cake so that he can bring home and share with yl also. but he suddenly tell me he's staying home.
PLAN SPOILER! >.<
but in the end still delivered.

and we went to catch Star Trek!
yayyyy! nice nice. got cute guy. that jimmy person.
and somehow he really knows alot of things.
im gaining alot of knowledge talking to him.
:D

so next who's going to eat popeyes with me!
oh and meeting the guides and the boys next week.
bringing my uncle to the doctor's tomorrow.
sea expedition on saturday.
and boom his exams begins.
ends.
australia trip.
danggggg.

ok to bed.

up the tempo; raise the beat.

2009-05-07T02:58:00.002+08:00

today i received alot of x potion.
and i like it. from the school. to the hill. to esplanade. to home.
and i especially love the part where we share a common goal.
it's big dreams like that that keeps us going.
and i wont forget how you feel like.
this passion we share.

my soulmate's name will start with S.
hahaha. all these quizzes.
i know it's all crappy.
but it just points to you. HAHA.
retarded.

i know you want more. (:

we are complementary.

2009-05-05T02:48:00.017+08:00

someone said i can make do with some updates.
but life's been really quite boring since i finished exams.

i have applied for some jobs. but they havent get back to me since.
and i am one who expects a certain amount of pay.
because opportunity cost is damn high. ):
but i realised the swine flu created employment!
you see all the job search engines has advertised temperature screeners jobs!

i have played mahjong a couple of times. winning sometimes, losing other times.
and eventually no inflow/outflow of income.
lol. but great bonding sessions!
and my bro's seriously my saviour.
and im really his jinx.
in mahjong only though. heee :D

let's see. ive been going to smu quite frequently nowadays. :xx
to provide support to the few people who are still having exams.
and so that i have company instead of staying alone at home.
plus there's free aircon whole day, why not?

caught wolverine last week.
it wasnt not too bad afterall!
he's really hot. and his muscles are woohooo! :D:D:D:D:D
can you imagine how nice it'll be to lean on?
hahaha.

went to sing at the chinatown ktv with giap maxton and my brother.
when we first entered, i said, mr chua made a reservation and he should be inside already.
the waiter led us to behind their counter into their kitchen
and turned out our room was this small room in the kitchen! :S
one and only okay!
best experience should have brought a camera man!
totally shocked. hahahaha it's just like cinderella's living conditions lol!
after that the four of us went to meet saifong and kenmun at the next street,
where they ate porridge and nice maxton sent us back! yays xDxD

pre-mother's day celebration for mum with the siblings at the tokyo restaurant in amara hotel.
the sashimi was freaking shiok! but it cost $40 per person.
but it's not too bad tasting!
i forgone going out with lauren maxton shaun beavan and jean.
they ate $375 for 5 people. zai.
hahahahaha.

lost $40 in mahjong that day. my biggest loss. greatest regret.
lol
damn it.

went to sentosa on saturday with the hall people.
it was supposed to be a TandZ outing la.
mostly TandZ people. but in the end we extended the invitation to everyone.
and there was about 21 people.
not too bad!
we got "sandfucked" quoting shaun.
running around the heated sand under the heating sun.
sf would have like this cos we were SUFFERING.
damn pain.
got sun burnt too. but we had fun playing volleyball, frisbee, touch rugby, what not.
great sun, good company!
peektures!

looking forward to this saturday's sea expedition.
ive gotten really dark from swimming and sentosa.
those who havent seen me in a while will know.

so i thought all i had to update was wake up, swim, eat, slack, facebook, blog, sleep.
and the cycle repeats.
turns out i have quite alot to update after all!

"Shared grief is half the sorrow,
but happiness, when shared, is doubled."
how apt.

anyway just for fun.
perfect lover wanted.
(quiz results from facebook)

Your perfect match is someone who is witty, outgoing and enjoys life. This person is the life of the party, has a great sense of humor and lights up the room with their smile. They communicate well and have a great connection with friends, family and their co-workers. Everyone is drawn to them and there is that special shine that you see in their eyes that tells you that they don't take one minute of life for granted. This person will sweep you off your feet, tell you exactly how they feel and are not shy to hug or kiss you in public. The top traits they are looking for in a mate is someone who is open to new ideas, is eager to live life to the fullest, will openly adore them and is confident.They love adventure, the outdoors and animals and if they discover you are interested in something, they will love that too! They are keen to get to know you and will quickly fall madly in love you for your personality, your smile and even just the sound of your voice.

yes i cant run away.
haha.

i dont know how i enforced so much.
but i hear it from you,
i see it in you.
that's a really fantastic feeling.
your constant reassurance.
and how the challenge is to keep me happy.
plus all the things you know girls need.
and how you were able to provide them.
(:

dance lance dance baby.

2009-04-26T04:57:00.003+08:00

let's see the things i could have been sad about lately.
i went home myself; him himself; and her herself.
my calls went unanswered thrice at the first go today.
equally important was a politically correct answer to please everyone.

1) i chose to do that.
and i bear my own consequences, no doubt.
but it was nice to know it'll never happen again.
even better to hear you brooding over it the next day.
and realization of it being wrong.
what's past's past. let's move on together.
(should be able to do that. but will never forget the pain HAHA)
at least you sort things out.
but super sorry you have to hurt another one.

2) a bad habit of mine.
can choose not to answer people's call/reply message.
but unacceptable when people do the same to me.
i am that demanding. haha.
since i am now an emergency caller.
i guess things will change.
(though i hate changing people for myself)
it's only a matter of importance.
a little jealous when it was because of her.
but dang. i cant be selfish. so i'll share. HAHA
small problem. im not a hogger.

3) apologetic about the sudden intrusion into your social circle.
but yet still wants to be there.
equally important is the answer to go to please everyone else.
i understand. it's just not pleasing to the ears.
and you just cannot please everyone.
but me being me,
i'd rather everyone else be pleased. and im not.

the damn it relationship destructive question of me or best friend. HAHA.

so yays. i could have been sad.
but i wasnt! heeeee!

and of course there are so many things else to be happy about!
because you owe me 1 of this, 1 of that, 1 of another of this, and 1 of another of that.
not forgetting i have been winning at mahjong.
and exam's over.
ok everything's great.

im missing something.
im missing somewhere.
and im missing someone.
great.

swimming in 4 hours.

revelations of a new me.

2009-04-25T01:16:00.003+08:00

sometimes it just doesnt feel nice to be out of place.
and with every other natural reaction,
you get defensive with your actions,
and unknowingly, you choose to step out of the picture.
watching the event as an audience.
when you are somewhere you are not supposed to be,
when everyone knows everyone else,
you just plug into your own music and live in your own world,
not bothering about them.
the worst of all is seeing the special one leave with another,
the effects of the heartache is devastating.
it wasnt jealousy or what.
it was just plain natural reaction of sadness.
and plain stupidity because it could have been the best of everyone's world.
but you chose to leave.
you chose to take a step back. and not enjoy every moment.
you chose to be the big hearted and nice one.

im really glad ive changed.
and cracks are not going to appear anytime soon!
because you are who you are.
and because you just understand things so well.
thank you for not hiding.
it really meant alot.

emo-ed for that short while.
but you just made things right again.

it's all about you.

2009-04-24T01:20:00.001+08:00

Using only song titles from ONE ARTIST to answer these questions. Pass it on to 15 people you like and include me. Try not to repeat a song title. It's a lot harder than you think.

Pick Your Artist: 周杰伦
Are you male or female: 可爱女人
Describe yourself: 浪漫手机
How do you feel about yourself: 我不配
Describe where you currently live: 安静
If you could go anywhere, where would you go: 千里之外
Your favorite form of transportation: 白色风车
Your best friend is: 乔克叔叔
Your favorite color is: 彩虹
What's the weather like: 晴天
Favorite time of day: 夜曲
If your life was a TV show, what would it be called: 最长的电影
What is life to you: 简单爱
What is the best advice you have to give: 听妈妈的话
If you could change your name, what would it be: 阳光宅男
Your favorite food is: 甜甜的
Thought for the Day: 你听得到
How I would like to die: 最后的战役
My soul's present condition: 开不了口
My motto: 给我一首歌的时间

whoever wants to do can just do it.
im just bored.
and waiting for something to happen (:

post exams.

2009-04-23T02:39:00.003+08:00

applied for jobs already.
ready to receive disturbing morning calls tomorrow.
damn it. :S

if weather's nice,
i'll go and swim tomorrow.

sushi with tianheeeee. heeheehee. (:

kbox with giap, maxton and maybe sf next week.
have to find more people.

supperclub's post exam celebratory dinner.
errrr kushinbo? as well as farewell for ken and alvinlim.
have to think about the guest list again. ://

misc.<3
out marking papers.
round island cycling
to the zooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
a picnic.
a nice dinner.
jb makan session.
minds cafe.

OOPS did i like forget to mention mahjong?

I LOVE MAHJONG HAHAH! :D

is it me or facebook has been quite dead lately.

bro's coming back from taiwan.
i miss him!
and i love him! because he's getting me some red havaianas thing.

the difference between yesterday and today.

2009-04-22T04:11:00.001+08:00

is FREEEDOM!
my exams finally ended.
cant be bothered to think about results.
i know im screwed, but i just want to enjoy the next few months of holiday.
sweet holidays man!
done with the 3 papers in 2 days.

studied at home myself on sunday. proud!
and just more mugging on monday and tuesday.

i played mahjong after my papers and is absolutely happy,
because i won money! could have been more, but never mind im contented.
HEEEEE.
despite touching all the books, you know those superstitions hahahaha.

supposed to eat mac breakfast tml.
but dang ):
never mind.
lunch will be good!

tonight's the last night in hall for me.
i'll be moving out tomorrow.
what I thought is very little.
is alot alot alot! OMG

OMG pimple outbreaks and eyebags.
what's next. and im falling sick.
AFTER EXAMS? WHAT?!

stealing glances ♥

2009-04-18T00:13:00.003+08:00

studied with km and sf today.
quite productive at SMU. not too cold not too warm.
but there was a bunch of noisy kids.
lucky we all had good mp3s that blocked out noises
(and lucky we study with music) HAHA.
went to eat at tian wai tian. and goodness their teens stories are hilarious.
these kids! TSKS!

i didnt mention i have a love-hate r/s with 14/4.
it was such a happy but pms-sy, stressed and bad mood day.
dang. it was bad. the exam stress. i almost cracked.

♥ing those random little actions.
little acts that goes a long way.
Ritter Sport White Chocolate With Hazelnuts is my new favourite chocolate. :D

otherwise 2 papers down and out.
buang totally. so screwed this semester.
the worst exams feeling.
damn it.
but yet it's the best exam season! haha.

hello lily.
so silly.
silly lily smiling sillily (:

stop; stare; smile.

2009-04-13T01:37:00.002+08:00

is beginning to feel the stress from exams.
(cos it's 2 days away from exams).

have about 13 chapters left from the first paper.
then 1/3 maths unpracticed for thursday's paper.

15 chapters of public finance for next monday's paper.
and 1/2 maths for tuesday's maths.
untouched biz law for tuesday's evening open book paper.

im so dead.
but i'll live through it.
i win some; i lose some.
needs my motivation smile!

heating up.

2009-04-12T23:43:00.002+08:00

force of attraction;
tip of contact;
interlocking.
intensified.

(:

answer to my random where are we heading to fb status is.
haha i haven gotten it yet.
till the next time!
xD

i need a lot of brainjuice. cos i want to remember everything.
from what you said to what im studying dang.

10th april....

2009-04-11T01:18:00.002+08:00

is a special day.
HAPPY 15th BIRTHDAY SISTER (:

though ur party is a simple one. hope u enjoy ur birthday nonetheless. hehe.

i can see the light.
i think that's where we are heading.
blantant, experienced game played.
the tackle has begun.
it's further than thought.

beautiful days spent with you. (:

3 and a 1/2 hours.

2009-04-09T04:09:00.002+08:00

2 way traffic is an exponential relationship.
clearing traffic jams. monthly, weekly, daily.

silly smile state.

2009-04-05T04:46:00.004+08:00

if there's anything i want to do.
and that i can do,
i want to remember everything exchanged today.
the words, the glances.
this is probably the start of something new.

experienced vs inexperienced is a vast difference.
i totally understand now.

(:

JJJJJJJJJ!

2009-03-29T03:20:00.002+08:00

heck whatever happened during the week.
probably just me slacking till 7am in the morning and waking up in the afternoon/evening.
and eating only one meal per day.
i lost weight. HAHA. the natural dieting method. sleep.

I LOVE JJ! (:(:(:
i just went to his concert.
we are the first stop of his 2009 tour.
and he's fantastic.

i want to bring him home.
i can listen to his emo songs anytime anywhere and not get bored.
he's so sweet and cute and he has dimples!

im absolutely sad that i only remembered my video function at the third last song.
there's a difference between the voice recorded songs and the video.
dang dang dang. regrets!
i want another go at it! damn!
but it was worth the money.
although i paid 50% of the original price.
but it would have been worth the money even if i paid full price! :D

it so rocked.
he made me cry thrice.
so touched.
i love the heartwarming feeling!
his whole family performed with him, and this, is EXCLUSIVE.
because only in singapore will this happen!

and during 简简单单 he stopped playing the piano and stopped singing.
and the audience continued for him.
the feeling. it was fantastic.
it felt so serene, so sweet. i bet it felt home for him.
it was like surround sound.

and like unlike other concerts,
they din even check my bag for camera or what.
nobody stopped anyone from recording.
i should have brought my cam/videocam.
and i actually walked past the ticket person without him tearing my ticket.
LOUSY.

i love the way he sings live.
i love the confidence that he has in himself.
although the crowd at home isnt as wild as those in taiwan.
im sure it was a different feeling celebrating your birthday with the home crowd.

i will go again. i will i will i will.
and for now i want to sing his songs over and over again.

i want to go with my crazy friends.
i want to shout 我们永远支持你~ ahahahha!

I

2009-03-22T01:27:00.002+08:00

want to go to the zoo.
want to eat steamboat.
am going night cycling again (round singapore yea)
am going to a fish port next friday tentatively.
ate ice cream.
need a job during the holidays.
cant think of anymore.
am having a headache.
am feeling good.
enjoyed myself at dinner today.
talked alot today. (too much LOL)
am going to bed now.

no emozz

2009-03-21T04:02:00.003+08:00

TGIF TGIF TGIF.
im 24 days away from exams.
i have not begun much.
and i have not been attending classes dilligently.
so much for wanting to pull up the lousy cap
but nevermind nevermind.
all's but just a number.

though i should never have to concentrate on other stuffs.

oh well.
that day i blogged about the week. but it's in my own comp.
so that will have to wait.

im still in hall! on a friday night or should i say saturday morning.
haha anyway, i went out for dinner with random people, desmond, alan, abigail and vijay.
then i went to watch a thai horror flick "Coming Soon"with alan and desmond.
some parts were scary (because of the build up suspense and effects and sounds and sudden po ups) not too bad.
but im a little afraid to be alone tonight; wild imagination.
scared when i went to bathe too.

thursday i woke up at 5pm. forgot training starts at 445pm.
didnt set alarm. as in because i didnt expect myself to zonk till so late.
so didnt eat anything and went down to train.
my vision went blur. black spots appeared. and then i went blind.
the last time this happened was when i donated blood for the first time.
it was quite scary.
after restingand drinking water, i felt better. and did a little tossing.
damn paiseh cos my first training i was sick and eetat didnt allow me to train.
and now the second training also.

but from the black out onwards, i have been having headaches.
like something is pressing against my head. pain.
and i went ball throwing with jovina alan and desmond just now.
got one more i didnt dare to catch because of the speed. and it hit my head.
lke OUCH. my first hit from softball. really a bit pain.
ahaha. but i did throwing for the frst time. and at least next week training i think i can do something already.

willard's going home tomorrow.
dang. dont know if i shud go home tml.

dinner with mrp tomorrow!
should be ok should be ok.
hahahaha weird.

sigh. the previous entry was a spur of the moment.
haha long time never talk to him and prolly envious of what she had that i didnt in the past.
lol.

ultimately. aye. i still want to be given the chance to be with you. the chance that you never gave. that you said never existed. that changed and left after a good few occasions. it's just not thesameperson.

this love has taken its toll on me, again.

2009-03-18T03:37:00.003+08:00

as the wind howls and blows,
the rain falls and splatters.
still the memories of us stayed,
reminding me of every painful past.

why do i keep losing them?

because of you, i lost him.
and because of him, i lost you.
and because of me, i lost the both of you.
your indecisiveness. my divided heart.
now all i can do is regret.
and look at you with another one.

how much i wanted him back then,
and finally got him back with me.
but i didnt cherish.
and i lose him a second time, permanently.

miserable night.
i didnt know i missed you, till i talked to you again.
:(

because of a passerby in my life.
a passerby who's going to stay.
a passerby whose love is impossible.
so near yet so far.
distracted me for a moment.
blinded me enough to see your presence blurly.
so subtle that i lost you eventually.

on a sidenote,
mrp came to hall today.
but i was asleep and he din want to disturb me.
haha took enough effort to check if i was online and all.
HAHA.

was it concern or?

2009-03-07T01:16:00.004+08:00

game over.
continue or leave.

~~phish. phook.~~ phuck.
dont even have to apologise.
i dont need it.
NORMAL, aint it.
NORMAL NORMAL~
>=(
and enjoy your tonight.

life's better when you dont think so much.
"seeing is not a problem, thinking about what you saw is"
i have successfully think of the possible reasons as what you would have like it to be.
how's peaceful life. haha.
oh wells.

A conversation is communication by two, three, or more people. It is a social skill that is not difficult for most individuals. Conversations are the ideal form of communication in some respects, since they allow people with different views on a topic to learn from each other. For a successful conversation, the partners must achieve a workable balance of contributions. A successful conversation includes mutually interesting connections between the speakers or things that the speakers know. For this to happen, those engaging in conversation must find a topic on which they both can relate to in some sense. Those engaging in conversation naturally tend to relate the other speaker's statements to themselves. They may insert aspects of their lives into their replies, to relate to the other person's opinions or points of conversation.

this was lacking.
between me and you.
but not me and him.
as much as i had hoped you are the one.

NO EMO.
NORMAL.
HAHA.

in fact quite happy today.
hahahhaa. shyshy.
lalalalalaa.

continued./

wants to go sea expedition.
but who will kayak with me?
i bet you wouldnt' be.
haha.

mrp. thanks for your super positive impression HAHA.
:D

different light.
likes the expression on your face.
(:

messing all of you up right.
that's my point YAY!

Whatever.

2009-03-04T14:30:00.002+08:00

with a capital W.

dont change lane.
maintain your gear.
keep on moving straight.

see.
dont think.
think.
dont see.
dont let what you see confirm what you think.
dont let what you think confirm what you see.

bo hiu
bo chap
bo daiji.

for my roomie

2009-03-04T02:12:00.002+08:00

i love you too much to want to change roomie.
please dont be so sensitive. i'll never leave you.
*unless i got not enough points to stay next year *
but dont worry you are the only one i want to stay with.
because there are no others like you who knows me best.
you are always there for me, and i will be too, for you.
so please dont think so much! and dont have nightmares.
because there's nothing you should worry about okay.

WITH ALOT OF LOVE,
YOUR ROOMIE HUIYEN<333333333333333

tired.

2009-02-24T23:52:00.003+08:00

physically, mentally.

haha nightcycled on friday night.
set off at midnight. the guys were drinking before that.
afternoon was spent watching slumdog millionaire.
everything was fine till something happened and i cried.
lucky xianmin was with me. and she told me to cry.
love the girl who loves to call me silly.
haha.
went to eat dinner with zhenming, giap, shaun, keesiang and xianmin at 179.
because i didnt want to stay in hall to see what i hate to see,
and eat what i hate to eat.

was fine by nightcycling.
I LOVE CYCLING!
the troubles fly with the wind!
woohoo. we were the last detail to set off.
and consists mostly of my clique people.
COOL SHIT.
caught up with detail no 3 before we even reached the first stop at west coast.
apparently someone was missing. (and he went to JP or something)

hahah the guys as usual were having fun.
singing army songs and stuff.
i like to laugh at them do the stupid things.
maxton kept cycling alone in front.
so i keep cycling forward to talk to him.
with the gear, i can cycle with ease.
(as compared to willard's cool bike HAHA)

maybe that's why saifong thinks im fit.
cos apparently i can cycle upslope without getting off the bike.
(looks at alvin lim who alighted twice AHAHA)
saifong's my new friend. (we have about 8 common hall11 friends)
brought in by giap to help lead us.
but i did went night cycling before.
so got a little bit of experience la.
heh. but he's quite a nice person to talk to la.
exchanged on our nightcycling route.
apparently its quite the same.

so we were at the back talking,
when we realised we missed a turn.
and the whole group has to cycle one big round.
(cause he was supposed to lead us) hahaha.

the saddest thing of this cycling trip is.
from $15 it became about $615.
cos i dropped my camera (which was in my unzipped bag)
on the way from one pit stop to the other.
and i couldnt find it. :(:(:(:(:(:(:(
though i went back twice!
surprisingly, ididnt cry
geeee. maybe i swung my bag too high.
and it dropped into the bushes.
otherwise i cannot understand why nobody saw nor heard it drop.
BOO!
and my birthday just passed for exactly 2 months that day.
i have to wait 10 months, if i want someone to pay for me.
ZAAAAAAAAAARRRRRR.
thankyou zhenming and saifong for going back with me to find my camera.
:D

the buttache wasnt as pain as expected.
maybe cos the other time i cycle twice the time i did this time.
hahah. but i also learnt how to cycle without using both hands.
so cool right.
paid $600 for this lesson man.

haha. finished at about 630am.
went for macs with the rest.
alvinlim sent me home. THANKS(:
came home. dad fetched me out to search again.
thought i can find it maybe in the day.
came back 9plus10am. ate my dabao-ed mac.
and slept.

woke up at 1plus. and went to cityhall to meet hao to go watch xingandstrum.
met renling, ktang and alvinlye too.
so we went together.
ken arrived about one hour later.
and we also met jiahao there.

FINALLY, ken, jiahao, hao and i went to eat POPEYES.
YAYS! love popeye's mashed potato!
my favourite. in the past i used to be able to finish the drink, 2 pcs chicken, mashed potato, fries and scone. (REMEMBER WANRU!?! (: )
but now. i can only finish abit here and there. HAHA.
lousy stomach.
~~you fulfilled your promise, BUT LATE!~~

on the way back to the mrt station, ken walked up to me and asked if i know the person at the back.
haha. talk about coincidence, it was saifong.
hahaha. so zun.
he went to collect his ocbc cycling thing.

slept at 1am. i know i was tired. but duno why i slept so late.
woke up at 630am on a BLOODY SUNDAY MORNING.
because i was supposed to go for this canvassing event thing.
station master for a NE CDC amazing race thing.
was supposed to reach at 7am.
i was on time.
but the rest (esp those taking the bus provided) were LATE!
geeeeeeee. and the organisers still warned us not to be late.
LIKE HELLLLLO?
they reached at about 845? like WTF.
waste my time waking up early.
thankgoodness my job was easy.
met other UOC 09 committee people. made a few new friends.
my job was to stay under the tree to STAMP on the participants card to acknowledge they have completed this statoin.
whilst the rest have to stand in the sun to either do briefing.
or the activity (DRAGONBOATING) itself. heh.
but i still got sunburnt.
GUA GUA.

went to eat at toapayoh food court with daryl rabnick and suling. candice went home.
then though we were all very tired.
we proceeded to OLD TOWN coffee to LIMKOPI.
and chit chat till 530pm. DAMN COOL LA.
went to my ahma house and din sleep till midnight again.
):

MONDAY hanisah huiqi and i, ALL H. went back to NYJC to eat and see the teachers.
but it was BLOCKTEST WEEK (like damn early la, cos of YOG and stuff).
and alot of teachers went back (ESP MR NANDWANI! the one hanisah wanted to see most)
me and qi not so much cos we saw him on open house a few weeks back.
but we did managed to talk to ATAN, MRHENG(OUXIANG!), MR LOW, MR NG. ETC!
so fun. and yes WE ARE THE BEST BATCH.
HAPPYGOLUCKY AND NO ATTITUDE PROBLEM. WE SO ROCKED.
heh. went to toapayoh BK to eat again then shopped around there.

TUESDAY. i went for a project meeting at bishan. then went all the way to shaw towers to buy this ice cream that my brother likes for him. heh. so sweet of me.

ok that's my life.
so tired please.
and i jogged on monday and tuesday with my brother.
TIRING TIRING.
but ok im on the way.
so when in hall, can u guys please jog with me please.
heh.

have to start doing work tomorrrrow!

hope you are having fun! (:
and take care.
and buy presents for me!

since you cant go back to the past,
as much as i could and try to.
i can only try to make the best of our present.
and you can try as hard as possible too.
but that's only possible,
if you are willing to do the impossible.
so talk to me only if you REALLY REALLY can PEACE.
rather than like the last time, when PEACE was still NOT PEACE.

absence,

2009-02-21T22:11:00.003+08:00

i'll be thankful if people stops talking about it.
and you stop talking to people about it.
and i can stop talking to you about it.
but none of this can be stopped.

yays. love our one-word arguments.
(:

and this one week will be helpful, right.

dhoenrttatlko anymore please.
for one week at least.
but it's impossible heehee.
nevermind.
HAHA.

im unaffected by your sms-es.
i tried to be.
but when everything falls into place,
and i finally confirmed what happened.
the tears fall uncontrollably.

very random trains of thought.
where i have to hide some stuff too.
so u guys prolly wun be able to understand haha.

evolution

2009-02-20T06:09:00.002+08:00

when you get too much sadness,
it slowly becomes irritating, annoying, and pissifying.
exactly how i feel now.
so whatever attitude you want to give,
i'll just suck thumb and accept.
up to you where this will go.
because i did my best to save whatever i could.
all the up-to-you-to-think-whatever-i-want,
just gives the feeling that you do not care anymore.
and save the 3 dots, okok for yourself,
because that's #1 on my hate list.
and all the things you've ever said.
im going to erase it all from my mind,
and pretend that you've never said it.
because they are all lies, lies and still lies.

even BELIEVING has a LIE in it.
one big step to leaving. doing well girl.
one fine day, you'll be part of the past, my history.

退后

2009-02-19T05:10:00.001+08:00

天空灰的像哭过
离开你以后并没有更自由
酸酸的空气
嗅出我们的距离
一幕最新的结局
像呼吸般无法停息

抽屉泛黄的日记
找到了回忆
那笑容是夏季
你我的过去被算是真的忘记
缺氧过后的爱情
如星的眼泪是多余

我知道你我都没有错
只是忘了怎么退后
信誓旦旦给了承诺
却被时间扑了空
我知道我们都没有错
只是放手会比较好过
最美的爱情回忆里待续

天空灰的像哭过
离开你以后并没有更自由
酸酸的空气
嗅出我们的距离
一幕最新的结局
像呼吸般无法停息

抽屉泛黄的日记
找到了回忆
那笑容是夏季
你我的过去被算是真的忘记
缺氧过后的爱情
如星的眼泪是多余

我知道你我都没有错
只是忘了怎么退后
信誓旦旦给了承诺
却被时间扑了空
我知道我们都没有错
只是放手会比较好过
最美的爱情回忆里待续

我知道你我都没有错
只是忘了怎么退后
信誓旦旦给了承诺
却被时间扑了空我知道我们都没有错
只是放手会比较好过
最美的爱情回忆里待续

变变变，变了。):

2009-02-18T12:55:00.002+08:00

peace now.
so whatever i feel about it,
i'll not say it out.
just let my mind and heart suffer.
when people tell me stir at my own risk,
im usually not that brave.
when one loses, the other gain.

~~he's not going to care anymore~~

day#1 already ahhhh.
:(:(:(:(:(:(:(

nothing i can do.
stop making your problem his problem.
they gave you the solution already.
but will you bear to do it?
though they misinterpreted the 2 words.
they'll never get it though.

please dont go away any further.
thankyouverymuch, moving to 55? sighs.

cousin's accomodation.

2009-02-17T15:44:00.000+08:00

she wants to get out of this place.

got to stop thinking.

2009-02-17T02:22:00.002+08:00

hates seeing the conversation every day.
or every time maybe.
drink and be emo.
not emo then drink.

there's a difference ok ken.

tears are for the weak.

2009-02-15T03:40:00.002+08:00

HEARTSUPERPAIN.

tell me not to go, and i'll not. one more time to confirm.

2009-02-13T15:52:00.006+08:00

keep your hopes low girl.
if not the fall will be harder than ever.

evil mislead.
concentrate and dont let the thoughts drift.
不要想太多。没有人会理解。

if only you are the same person i know at night, in the day.

limited existance with shortlived happiness. 曾经拥有。

really nothing to say?
then ok. i got it.

IM SAD.

2009-02-08T05:44:00.002+08:00

:'(

if you read this,

anyone including you kaypohs.

please give me a hug on my tagboard pls.

thankyou.

loves.

it's tough keeping it in,boy.

2009-01-31T04:10:00.003+08:00

you seriously dont care.
or just simply cant be bothered to, no?
yes im 19 acting like 9.
i like it and it's who i am.
im angry because i know you've been there.
but you hadnt even been here once.
im disappointed because you are not doing anything,
despite knowing most things.
im sad because you'd chose the worse solution
to this very problematic problem.
im going to shed my first and last tear for you tonight.
because i do know i had enough.
and i should start filling up the bottomless pit.
and last but not least, fuck it all.
why should you have peaceful sleeps
and i get the sleepless nights.
FUCK.

我会试着放开。

2009-01-28T03:30:00.005+08:00

HAPPY

今天的我有点不对劲。

CHINESE

我开始对你发脾气了。

NEW

生气之于却感到心疼。

YEAR!

心里不舒服而且想哭。

HUAT AH!

已经累了。
不想懂了。
想要离开。
但走不开。

想太多，手放开，我难过。
我的心真的受伤了。

HAPPY CHINESE 牛YEAR!

2009-01-25T04:13:00.002+08:00

haha not yet.
it's the eve of CNY only.
*think of the food later during reunion dinner*
heard aunt bought 17 cans of abalone.
yes she rocks.
heard grandpa bought super big prawn to make steam butter prawn.
yes he rocks.
heard 2nd aunt bought the rest of the good good food, ie sharkfins.
yes she rocks.
dinner will rock.
and that's gonna be the 3rd rocking dinner.

i extracted my wisdom tooth on wednesday.
IT'S DAMN FUCKING PAIN!
the 6th day after i experienced pain.
i couldnt even bite properly using the other side of my mouth.
i visited the dental.
and decided that i shud remove it.
he advised that so that i can eat my reunion dinner properly.
duno if it's a right choice.
initially he was going to jab my mouth with anaestetic.
i opened my mouth of course.
but once the needle was at mouth.
my mouth auto shut down tightly and it just refused to open.
this is what i call inner fear.
after that my mouth was numb.
and during the whole process, i can only see the dentist jerking at my tooth.
omg his action was so big. and he was tugging at my tooth with his finger at the end.
and when it came out, there was such a HOOHA at my tooth.
because it is so freaking big.
at least 1cm in height. damn horrible!
but at least i get many days of MC woohoo!

and i have been experiencing pain since then.
but nihon mura on friday with my siblings was good.
i took painkiller before that. but that night was horrible.
the pain was a killer. and i cried. it was hurting badly.

then saturday(which was yesterday) was reunion dinner with supper club.
me junhao ken alvinlim alvinyeo sandy jiahao weekeat willard and ansel.
sakura buffet at tampines safra. food is not bad (would have been better if i had a normal mouth)and it's 25$ only! nice nice! damn it that i cant eat with both sides of my mouth.
i was eating so slowly! tsks. pity alvinlee cant come.
yes the 3 alvins are living along the same row in hall, side by side.
4 in fact, alvinlye stays 2 units away.
heh.

after the dinner we went to watch love matters at TM. funny movie.
we laughed alot. but the plot was bad. another no-brainer local production.
but never mind. at least we laughed! $8 for a weekend night movie at 1035. not too bad already.

the worse of all is. it could have cost so much more.
after the movie we went to the toilet, gathered outside the cinema and waited for the guys.
they came out late because junhao actually dropped his wallet inside and they went back to look for it.
intuition told me to check my bag. and i realised my phone is missing too.
asked ken to call my hp and they decided not to play with me.
turns out when they were looking for junhao's wallet, they found my phone too.
omg thank god. if not i would have only realised when i reached home.
i would have cried. and can say byebye to my new phone already.
they also found willard's basketball keychain.
the thing is my phone is in my bag. i dont know how it dropped.
maybe TM's cinema has come gravitational force one la.
but im really thankful they found it (:

in advance, 恭喜发财！*throws in all the four word chinese phrases*
HEHE :D
check out pictures in fb when i upload it back in hall :D

on a side note, i guess i have reached the peak of getting to know you.
every step of getting to know you better has been turning into diminishing marginal returns.
im tired. i want to keep things here. i dont want to turn things bad.
but these oversensitivities are going to kill me sooner or later.
or maybe kill our non-existing close ties.
you are something i want. but im not sure if you are something i need.
but you certainly have integrated into my life.
resigning to fate has made me give up dreaming about what i might not need.
but it has not stop me from thinking about you.
dont know what you want, dont know what you are thinking about.
your actions, my interpretations. they might be going in different directions after all.

you have been missed.

2009-01-20T21:36:00.001+08:00

hello mervin.

you would have been 21 today.

just wanna wish you a HAPPY BIRTHDAY anyway (:

it's been almost a year.

i havent been meeting manel.

i dont know how are you, nor how is she.

but just know that you have been missed.

hope you'd have a blast wherever you are.

one year down, many more to go.

happpy birthday :D

cant bear the distance; cant bear the time till i next see you smile.

2009-01-12T21:36:00.003+08:00

Oooh, Whoa, Whoa, Ooh, Ooh, Whoa, Whoa

I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time
Deep inside
it was a crush, what a crush
Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way
About me
It's just too much, just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know

Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we can be
Where this thing could go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch your breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do
Cause I'm trying, trying to walk away
But I know this crush aint going away, going away

Has it ever crossed your mind
When were hangin, spending time girl,
Are we just friends
Is there more, is there more
See it's a chance we've gotta take
Cause I believe that we can make this into
Something that will last, last forever, forever

Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we can be
Where this thing can go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch your breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do
Cause I'm trying, trying to walk away
But I know this crush aint going away, going away

Why do I keep running from the truth
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I just got to know

Do you ever think
When you're all alone
All that we can be
Where this thing can go
Am I crazy or falling in love
Is it real or just another crush
Do you catch your breath
When I look at you
Are you holding back
Like the way I do
Cause I'm trying, trying to walk away
But I know this crush aint going away
This crush aint going away
Going away
Going away
Going away
Going away
Going away

out of control

2009-01-08T04:32:00.002+08:00

she feels terrible.

you dont have to do this.

she's lost.

she doesnt want this.

she's trying so hard,

too hard to stop things.

she cannot take it anymore.

all the crap you've given,

she doesnt deserve it in any way.

she cant stop thinking.

she's mindful of her presence.

she lost all given hope.

she had enough in a week.

in just three days.

she has chosen to leave.

she will disappear.

she's trying so damn fucking hard.

so fucking stop it.

it's been a year...

2008-12-31T14:32:00.001+08:00

i guess i should update since it's the last day of 2008.
have been really busy in hall with competitions and christmas!

spent christmas with the supper club at changi hotel.
but we merely went in for 15 minutes when we received complaints already.
haha and we haven even start playing games.
so we decided to move out to ken's house,
where we played games, drink, play mahjong, talk cock and EXCHANGE PRESENTS.
it wasnt your typical gift exchange. hahahah!

26th was my brother's birthday.
went out with astro in the afternoon where we had gift exchange and they celebrated my birthday too (: received my present. now THANK YOU! (: we also played card games.
then i went to eat dinner for my brother's birthday then hall not so sweet hall.

watched soccer IHG on the 27th, takraw on 29th and soccer on 30th!

and now it's NEW YEAR's eve alreadyy.
so let's see what happened in 2008.

i had my first part time job for 6 month at Canon Singapore.
worked as an admin assistant and got to know many many new friends from all other departments. haha they were really fun people to hang out with though my work is boring stuff.
earned my first paycheck and it feels good to have money! i can shop like nobody's business!
so thank you colleagues for the unforgettable experience and presents! (: plus they even invited me to the dinner and dance 5 months after i finished working!

then i got my A level results in february. though i'd screwed up physics so i cried.
but geog was the one which got screwed. nonetheless, i was quite happy with results.
applied for business and did not get in. so i chose maths and economics (which aint so good)

half of the year was spent working. so there isn't much big events.

start of july was busy. it's like a whole new chapter of life.
i went to 2 camps consecutively. Union Camp 2008 where i met ASTRO! and Hall 11 FOC.
and more friends of course!

moved into Hall 11. and dont know why, dont know how, dont know when, i started hanging out with the SUPPER CLUB. they are like the clique in hall for me. of course my roomie xianmin is always there! AND her boyfriend coincidentally was posted into hall 11 too! got to know the rest of the eleveners. and that's a whole lot of people there! but i still prefer supper club!
they are the most fun and entertaining people. they never fail to make me laugh!
everyday from then on was spent with them. not clubbers, not gamers, i dont know, we just like to hang around and chit chat, occasionally drinking.
the thing is most of them are year 3s. so i dont have much time left with them.
though we just spent only about 4-5 months together, it feels like years.
and ken is graduating next sem already ):

school started. has a group of friends in MAEC where we go lessons together, but ive been skipping alot of lectures. *have to change next semester!* many different types of people in a group. of course ive been the laziest. haha

had my first uni exams. screwed up. but haha. dont know what to feel about it.

my wish came true, someone came back. and i didnt cherish him properly.
and when he's gone, it's gonna be too late for regrets.

relationships-wise,
it's a he-likes-me, but he's 27 and 30, and i wont-like-him. (x2)
it's a he-likes-me, but i dont-like-him.
i-like-him, but he-dont-like-me.
we-like-each-other, but we-just-cant-get-together.
so no luck. when your heart has to be divided for so many use.
if there was only one person at one time. i guess the last one would be successful.

my new year resolution is to go swimming!
i have been wanting to swim, but i just cant get my butt down to the pool!

HAPPY NEW YEAR GUYS.
im lazy to upload photos.
so sorry for the wordy post. (:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

2008-12-21T18:19:00.002+08:00

to myself! (:

hahahaha im 19 already.
shucks! getting old.
cant say im 18 anymore.

thanks to everyone for their wishes.
im still waiting for yours! :D

i bought my new phone today.
was deciding between G705 and W980.
friends said G series was laggy. dad said G705 looks like my old phone.
so i eventually got w980!
but sadly there wasnt the red colour one.

and while ive gotten my new phone.
i got it in such a rush. i forgot about the stuff in my memory card.
lucky the person upload to my new phone.
but darn i totally forgot about the messages.
damn sad.

now it's really damn super sad.
because everything has officially ended.
i dont have any messages to look back anymore.
messages from you people.
things that i want to look back at.
what a day.
and it's my happy birthday somemore.
damn damn damn.

p.s im not blaming you.
i know it's my fault.
i'm just regretful.

permanent ending.

2008-12-14T23:14:00.002+08:00

i dont have to think anymore.
dont have to accomodate to anything.
it feels sad. but no point wallowing in self pity.
so i'll just cry finish tonight.
and life begins again tomorrow.

just want to tell you when sc asked during truth or dare.
my answer was 70%.
but what you confirmed with me reduced it to 0%.
the same night, just an hour apart.

all or nothing at all.
nothing lasts forever.
and alll lasts for a moment only.

this is the season to be jolllllly~

2008-12-05T01:34:00.002+08:00

it's december already! yays!

I LOVE DECEMBER because:

1) it's my birthday
2) it's christmas
3) there's a hari raya public holiday (so working people can go out with me)
4) it means HOLIDAYS!
5) time to go overseas

and so on and so forth heeee.

have so many pictures to upload.
and update my blog about genting trip with The Supper Club, and BATAMANIA with Hall 11!

i just came back from batam.
update another day!

starhub!

2008-11-25T19:32:00.002+08:00

one year ago, i lend my sister my plan to get her phone.
so she came back and told me she got the STUDENT PLAN. (with 1000 free sms)
one year later, last sat i suddenly take my bill out and see.
last time i just see how much is my bill.
but last sat i scrutinised the bill and realised ive been overcharged for 1 year!

my previous plan was 500 free sms only. so for every sms exceeded, i was charged!
damn so i called starhub. and they said they've to retrieve my application form.
today they called me and told me indeed it's their fault.

but they cant pay me back the overcharged.
so instead they will extend my student plan (the new one with unlimited sms HIAKHIAK) for another 2 years. and top it up with 12 months free caller id display (worth $60). HAHA. i asked if i can have it in voucher or something but cannot! but she can request for vouchers for me. so nice! cool or what. so i then tot i have to wait another 2 years to buy phone. but she said now after 1 year already can buy phone. then i say but 1 year must pay $100 more! then she say if request voucher then dont need lo! hahaha that's nice.

hope they give it to me.
time to change phone!
i love starhub! HEE!

no homecooked food.

2008-11-22T15:13:00.002+08:00

very disturbed.
i got no home-cooked food today.
*whines*
i say until very ke lian still no home-cooked food.
because my dad just mopped the floor.
so he better bring me go eat crab or something!
HMPF.

ytd i went out for dinner with 0605 at aston's amk.
kaiyang, shuenlin, justina, sarah, xiaobai, huiqi, yumin, gillian, mapok.
then we went to mac to chill and talk.
so fun so fun.

and when i was going home, at the interchange.
this havoc auntie in super mini skirt and spaghetti top. short spiky gold hair.
looks maybe 40+.
and it was midnight, then she asked if there's any bus that can go hougang.
cos the boyfriend (i think is boyfriend got no more bus home).
then after that she say 不要管他了。每次都要陪我到自己没有bus回家。
都叫他不要等了。
she then told me. 痴情的男人就是这样。有时还会害怕他们。she kept asking the guy to go home. but the guy just silently stood one side and look at her. and left only when the bus comes.

hahahahaha nice hor this kind of guys.
HAHA
envious! lol

EXAMS OVER!

2008-11-21T03:22:00.003+08:00

NOT!
not yet.
not quite yet.
but soon!
like on 25/9! HAHAH!

cant wait man.
im already in holidays mood.
haven gone home for 1 weekend already.
must study so hard. poor me!
and so stressed summore ):

it's a very bad period of exams i think.
cos i had two CORE papers on the first day of exams. (13/11)
then i had one CORE paper on (18/11)
one CORE and one ELECTIVE on (19/11)
that's like 3 papers in 2 consecutive days how to study!
and i only started on like friday? lol
geeeees!
i finished 5 papers in 5 school days actually.
so i think i deserve to rest
and start again over the weekends.
:/ stressed.

but here are my plans for the holidays so far:
21/11 ONE MONTH TO MY BIRTHDAY, haha kidding. 0605 gathering!
23/11 JB with family!
25/11 END OF EXAMS!
26/11 talkcocksingsongplaymahjong with EUGENE!
27/11-29/11 GENTING WITH THE SUPPER CLUB.
2/12-4/12 BATAMANIA WITH HALL 11.
19/12 CANON DINNER AND DANCE (yes they invited me back. haha for free woohoo!)
so exciting can meet everyone again.
29/12 LASERQUEST WITH 56 PEOPLE!

hahah and in between maybe going korea/hongkong/beijing with my folks.
mid dec i think.

and a outing with mr ow too haha!

exciting dec!
not really la. cos got inter hall games coming up too.
and im totally not prepared haha.

sister's gonna go japan on monday for band exchange.
now im the only one who hasnt been there gees.

anyhow, im going to LIN JUN JIE'S CONCERT with THE SUPPER CLUB!
28th March 2009! woohooo!
tickets were going for 50%.
got some offer la.
at first we got 8 seats side by side.
but realised we bought one extra.
so we have to rechoose
.and in the end NO MORE!
so 3 of us have to go to $54 instead of $64.
half price means. actually $108 and $128 respectively. haha (:
YAYS(:

ok im going to watch show now woohoo!

2008-11-09T04:33:00.000+08:00

have you ever tried crying till your nose feels hot.

and your tears just keep falling like how the rain does.

well, i had and the feeling aint very nice.

2008-11-01T02:44:00.002+08:00

im pathetic cos all i know to do is cry.

i learnt how to let go few months back.
you didnt have to come back and make me learn how to let go again.
each scar takes time to heal.
you didnt have to come back to make it a fresh wound again.
i shouldnt have to say goodbye so many times.
why does my heart feels like it's been broken again.

because every of your word stings.

even though it's my fault about the way things are.

How long does happiness last?

2008-11-01T00:49:00.002+08:00

nice question to ponder about, ym.
Happiness doesnt last forever of course.
but it'll last as long as you believe it will.
because once you stop believing,
emotions like sadness, jealousy, anger, disappointment take over.
i dont know. it hasn't been long lasting for me at least.
bad things always follow when you feel you are at the peak of happiness.
i just dont get why. what goes up must come down?
so damn true. but these other emotions are present to show the difference between happiness and them. but currently im in nodal state.
that means neutral. or should i put it as awkward. haha.
never mind.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN PEOPLE!
and at least it's a HAPPY HALLOWEEN for me! (:
PRE-EXAM STRESS RELEASE PILL!
(not like im studying for exams yet, still studying for quiz)
1) 12.40pm THE COFFIN at GV JP with junhao, ants, alvin, lard and jean!
2) 3pm KFC-ed with them!
3) slacked in hall for a while..
4) 4.30pm HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL 3 at GV JP with ken, crystal, yy, sandy, angela!
5) 6.30pm BARBECUE with senior from 56 and some from 55!

seee i enjoyed so much! the coffin was scary because of the effects but i didnt really get the show. hmmmmm. lol. but it was scary. and sad to a small extent but i still cried. okays teared more like it. but okays that's still cool! if only im 21, i'll watch HORRORTON!-> movie marathon for 3 horror movies (record, the coffin and SAW X!). stupid saw X is R21 la.....

HSM 3 is NICE, VERY NICE, REALLY NICE! gabriella is pretty! troy is sweet. watching the show makes me happy. but there's some sad parts as well. and this time i really cried. but it was quite funny. yy wanted to tell me something when she realised im crying! then she wanted to tell crystal that i was crying (want to laugh at me!) but crystal was crying too! LOL! but me crystal and yy were so high that we kept singing! (:

seee 2 movies with 10 different hall people. my first movies with them. niceeeee! HEE.

barbecue was fantastic. $12 for LOTS of food. we couldn't finish! got chicken wings, beef, lamb chops, fishballs, hotdogs, crabstick, rice, beehoon alot alot! supposed to be a senior's thing though. :/abit reluctant to go at first cos i tot willl be awkward. but in the end no lehs! quite fun summore! alot of funny things! i like i like!

the whole day feels like POST EXAMS. heeeee. in our dreams laaa huh.

so the week went past with deepavali holiday.
then CRYSTAL'S LASER QUEST! VERY FUN VERY FUN! my first time! thanks for inviting me there!
plus training, quiz, meetings, etc la.
but i like today the best!
xD
and ken sent me home too! no need travel home by bus yay i like!

to give pamela mian zi ahh...
1) THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
huiyen(: , tengteng, kaeyen

2) THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
huiyen(: , huiyen♥, huiyen's

3) THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
my left eye, my friendliness, and my cheerfulness!

4) THREE THINGS YOU DON’T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
my right eye, my big physique, my jealousy.

5) THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
toa payoh, cedar, kheng cheng

6) THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
ghosts, animals, exams.

7) THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
handphone, wallet, wordchallenge/bigbrain LOL

8) THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING NOW:
cedar BOUGEI house tee, fbt, specs.

9) THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS OR MUSICAL ARTISTS:
JAY, CAOGE, WANGLIHOM

10) THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS (RIGHT NOW):
how six songs collide, 给我一首歌的时间，说好的幸福呢.

11) THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
love, commitment, surprises!

12) TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE, IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:
i love myself. i am studying. i love you.

13) THREE THINGS ABOUT THE PREFERRED SEX THAT WILL APPEAL TO YOU:
hair, attitude, the way he talks to me, looks at me.

14) THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
word challenge! who has the biggest brain! blog hopping!

15) THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
PLAY, holiday, chill out!

16) THREE CAREERS YOU’RE CONSIDERING/YOU HAVE CONSIDERED:
finance, teacher, taitai.

17) THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
road trips with hall people, sikkim india and hongkong!

18) THREE NAMES THAT YOU LIKE:
huiyen, kaeyen, zyen.

19) THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
apologise to all that ive hurt, tell those i love that i love them, stock up more chocolate with me.

20) THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A BOY:
i used to have really short hair. i wear baggy shirts. im always in slippers.

21) THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A GIRL:
i cry. i wear skirts/dresses. i have long hair!

22) THREE MOST IMPORTANT PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE
family, friends, boyfriends.

23) THREE FAVOURITE DRINKS
pokka tea series, starbucks/coffeebean, kickapoo/mountain dew

24) THREE FAVOURITE MOVIES
highschoolmusical! harrypotter! .... alot.

25) THREE FAVOURITE FOOD
mcflurry! chocolate! frosties!

26) THREE THINGS YOU ARE BEST AT
making friends! acting happy! and being cheerful!

27) THREE SPORTS THAT YOU LIKE
volleyball, swimming, cycling/rollerblading!

28) THREE THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE
running. being jealous/angry, people talking about me.

29) THREE PLACES YOU SPENT THE MOST TIME AT
hall xi, south spine, home!

30) THREE ACHIEVEMENTS YOU HAD
prefect in primary school. patrol leader in cedar. exco member in nyps.

31) THREE BEST FRIENDS
wanru, huiqi, xianmin (:

32) THREE WORDS TO DESCRIBE YOUR FAMILY
mahjong-loving, naggy dad, best mum!

33) THREE PEOPLE THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO SEE DO THIS MEME:
anyone will do la.

as for now,

"Love is a luxury that I can't afford."

to no avail.

2008-10-27T04:11:00.003+08:00

ive tried spotting you in the crowd,

but no matter where i looked,

i couldnt find you.

i think you aint here with me at all.

ive tried so hard not to think about you.

but my mind just keeps floating to images of you, me, us.

i told myself to distance myself.

just so that i wont fall into another bottomless pit again.

2008-10-26T01:08:00.004+08:00

ive broken my own high score for word challenge many times already.
each time just trying to beat my personal best.
but today, i finally finally beat beavan's score.
and is 3rd in my friend's list. i rest my case already (:
the next target is junhao's, at 300+k. HMMMMM.
after the exams i guess.

talking about exams, i took back my quiz results for my maths modules.
not fantastic at all. not even average.
wake up call girl. wake up already.
i tried to wake up, i tried to study.
but the moment i opened my books,
i go into screen saver mood before zonking out eventually.
im very stressed already.
no more time.
left with 3 weeks.
and the worst thing that could happen was, i was planning to SU my 112.
and i thought right till the very day of the deadline.
and guess what, i forgot all about it at night until 1am. 3 hours past deadline.
so now ive got to study damn super hard for it.
im so dead.

basically, the past 2 weeks came and went.
cant remember got what big event.
well we painted the AC banner. everything's settled already.
wonderful. can look forward to an overseas trip with my hall people.
but i so hope we can go genting too.
(BOOHOOHOO! only you can read this. so you go hint to the rest okays :D)
you know those road trips? that'll be fun i suppose?
singing in the car.
making jokes and having lots of fun!

hmm so there was this day, SPMS was giving out exams welfare package and lunch at 11.30
we finished our class at 1030. so all of us just chilled around to wait till 1130.
but eventually we reached on the dot.
the queue was so freaking long, there wasnt any food left for us.
just the package. which is in those white plastic bag from the market.
so unglam please. so we went to eat lunch together.
one big group. i think at least 7 of us. ahhahaa.
very fun. we walked past this chocolate buffet thing for some event.
and i was so GIAN. wahlau! everything is CHOCOLATE! my favourite!
so tempting but so paiseh to actually go and get.
in the end royce and edward very nice, they buaypaisehedly went to take for us.

yumyum. then we did some personality test and we laughed at each other's answer.
well you must first imagine yourself in a forest. then there's a box somewhere.
you must think what kind of box is it and what's the size of it. then there's a tree.
but think what's the distance between the box and the tree. on the tree, there's a ladder what kind of ladder. and there's an animal. what is it?

so lengyee helped us see our characters and stuff. forget about the first part. the funniest part is the animal. so the animal represented your future partner. edward's answer was ANTS. hahaha. we said he'll has ALOT of partners. but eventually we conclude that it'll be the one and only QUEEN ANT. well. another funny one was royce's? his is a LION. and there's this girl in our tutorial class who looks and behaves like a lion. has BOMBASTIC hair and stuff. and he kept laughing at her in class and now we think they are suited for each other. mine was quite funny too. it's a squirrel and it's waving to me! wahlau at first thought i really laughed at my own answer. so i just told the truth. so from now on, i have to look out for people who wave to me? LOL . it's really nice just chilling out. and with my coursemates somemore! see i dont only hang out with hall people okays! xD

met up with ASTRO too! to celebrate TERRI'S BIRTHDAY. hahhaa. had dinner together. before i went off to SP to look for someone. the surprise failed as usual. and i went back to hall. lol. was abit upset. but it always happen. im such a lousy surpriser. haha. ):

then another night, me, junhao, ansel, willard, jean, weekiat played hotel626.com. you all should go and try! so we offed all the lights and all play this game together. wahlaueh! then after the whole game i was quite freaked out already, we started telling horror stories. some in hall. others are like murder scene. freaky please! and i had a nightmare that night and the night after. the first one eventually evolved into the police arresting my mum and i woke up crying. while the second one involved some aids person with a syringe containing his blood. SCARY MAN! :ZZZZ

so there was also hall halloween. nothing much. but i did went to draw my face la lol. then went to play some games in the hall. really nothing much. :S

hmmm haven been talking much to my family ever since i stayed in hall.
i mean besides weekends la. lol. and my sister just slept the whole saturday away.
dont know she concussed or what la. like she's going to sleep till tomorrow morning.
the pig's genes' in us you see. lol. so let me post a picture of her. feels really random. but she and the pig brother of mine has formed an ally and they are very mean. they always bully me on weekends. gees. so evonne was saying she wont stay hall next year because her brother going overseas then not nice to leave her parents at home alone. talking about this, brother's going attachment for 3 months in 3 different countries next year. and i'll still be in hall if i can. that leaves my sister with my parents HAH!

okays im going back to econs. there's 2 quizzes next week. (".)

photoless.

2008-10-20T04:15:00.003+08:00

i dont remember sharing a photo with you.
and i dont like the feeling of seeing you in another without me.
today you are the one i thought of.
and im trying so hard not to remember anything about us.

I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush

'Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way about me
It's just too much, just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Has it ever crossed your mind
When we're hanging, spending time girl, are we just friends?
Is there more, is there more?

See it's a chance we've gotta take
'Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last
Last forever, forever

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
This crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

David Archuleta - Crush.

"Multiply it by infinity, take it to the depths of forever and you'll still only have a glimpse of how much I love you."

2008-10-18T22:05:00.002+08:00

you'll know it's time to let go,
when your heart aint beating for the same person anymore,
and has gone to live for another person.

and when it's time to let go, let it go.
because if it's truly yours, it will come back someday.
no matter how many corners it will take to return.

if you were to choose,
would you rather be the one being loved.
or the one loving the other.

it's just somewhere out there,
around the bushes and trees.
even if it's blind and lost.
just follow your heart
and it will bring you to me.

(:

-huiyen (23rd September 2007)

i blogged that last year.
i personally think it's not bad a paragraph that i wrote there. :D
i kinda like reading my archives sometimes.
and laughed at my life in the past.

exams in one month.
in one month, the o's will be over.
haha.
gee.

i wanted to change my url actually.
but decided against it. maybe when this is 3 years old or something laa.
so i changed my blogskin. in like maybe 15 minutes? cool. :D

i dont know who i be thinking at this moment.

爱你爱我

2008-10-11T01:37:00.000+08:00

看着你的笑容，我心也融了
我想要冷静，但你是真的太美了
掉进爱情黑洞，没有所谓的出口

每当你不说，我知道你一定有心事
请你告诉我，让我可以帮你分担
我想要保护你
给我一次机会

我不会犹豫，不再犹豫
已没时间
爱我

Well，打开你的心窗就会看见
不要管他人，不用在意
跟着心走，你会发现
爱爱爱

听着音乐的节奏和旋律，跟我一起唱
我喜欢你的香味
这是上天的安排让我
爱爱爱上你

So,我不会犹豫，不再犹豫
已没时间
确定，没必要想得太多
时间不够
让我爱你
爱我

不用猜测我的真心，不要怀疑对你的爱
爱上你我别无选择，但我不曾后悔
我爱你，爱太深
只是忘了怎么后退

在这两个人的爱情游戏里并没有终点
如果能在一起，我想这是我们的命运
若没有你以后，生活没有意义

我不会犹豫，不再犹豫
已没时间
确定，没必要想得太多
时间不够
让我爱你
爱我

-爱你爱我

hahah my sister and i translated this one fine friday afternoon.
just for fun, randomly.
anyway it goes in the tune I'M YOURS BY JASON MRAZ.
some place only we know how to sing la huh. HAH.

I WANT TO GO TO JAPAN!

2008-10-11T01:03:00.003+08:00

snorts.
sister's flying over to perform in japan with her band.
plan was the family follow her there to watch her.
departure 24th.
BUT MY FREAKING EXAMS END 25th! HOW NICE.
i will try to persuade my parents to not depart without me, 25th night! 1 night no difference la!
HIAKHIAK
I WANT TO GO JAPAN!

anyhow life's happening this week.
happening in the sense, i have been napping too much.
falling sick.
and practically skipped lectures.
* reminder to self: STOCK UP ON PANADOL *

so it's just out at nights. past midnight.
should i even call it nights? HAHA. maybe mornings.
with thesupperclub for supper.
or with jacob, singchang, kevin, kevingf and brandon.

monday was a damn hectic day.
first i had netball training it ended at 9.45.
supposed to meet ASTRO at 10pm to celebrate suling's birthday (which was set at 11pm)
walked there after training. from hall 2 all the way to yunnan garden.
i nearly died!
thesupperclub fetched me from yunnan garden and back.
celebrated suling's birthday.
left early when jacob&co came to fetch me from yunnan garden back to hall to bathe.
(they waited damn freaking long total 1hr 15minutes or so) HAHA
supper!

i get bullied in hall pretty often.
hor! *stares at soh*. >=(

went to a lunch buffet at nihonmura.
$15.90++ for students 2.30-5.30pm.
with free flow drinks, sushi, random food, sashimi.
damn good la!

anyway NTU's organising blood donation drive
and i want to go!
despite my really bad first experience.
i dont want to faint again.
and i dont want to go alone too.
so someone better honour his words arh!

so i need you to tell me where i stand;

i need to dive into your heart,

to see if there's even a small portion of me in there.

it feels so right yet im afraid it's so wrong.

needs your honesty, my certainty.

things are moving too fast, moving beyond my control.

i hate to know about competition,

because i know ill always make the choice to leave.

so if you are not going to tell me anything,

please be prepared to see me go.

i dont wanna say goodbye,

i dont wanna stay as friends.

UPDATES (:

2008-10-05T01:23:00.017+08:00

okays im back.
life's a little messy and what not.
just finished 6 quizzes.
i finally can take a break, not.
screwed up some quizzes, did quite well for some.

because trainings for all my activities have begun.
problematic schedule.
basketball, netball, volleyball, and now boggle.
my life revolves around so many things.
i dont know what to put as priority.
maybe #1 should be settling my r/s rather than other people's.
but i dont know how to go about doing things.

anyway, ive been totally hooked on word challenge.
at least one game per day.
but ive been breaking my record each day.
from 45k+ to 50k+ and now it's at an all high 60+. (:

i finally travelled out of ntu last week.
it was recess week, aka meet up with people week.
first few days were spent in hall relaxing and totally just slacking.
then i also met up with 0605, like finally i can make it.
and it was like 11 out of 14 people attended.
we are cool. dinner at the cathay!
and mac with ym, mapok and qi after that. xD

i also went out with Astro to kbox!
SING SANG SUNG! NICE NICE!
must go more often
we sang damn old songs
you know the jin zhen tou song?
LOL we sang that! gees!

then went to batam on friday (early morning to night)
the highlight would be hmmm, GO KARTING.
because the rest of the time we were just checking out the place.
but go kart damn expensive ($18 for 10 min)
but it's damn damn fun!
i skidded and turned 2 rounds or something
i also managed to drift.
how cool right! (:
reached back singapore at midnight looooo.

hmmm. school still sucks as usual very boring.
i totally love holidays.
there come children's day and hari raya.
willard invited me to a "children's day party"
and i naively thought it was really a c.day party.
because he's really that kind of siao on people.
and i was so excited. like wondering what we gonna do.
until facebook informed me that it'll be his 21st on the 2nd. HAHA.
felt damn stupid la.

haha and the group of us went from like hall all the way to hougang to attend his party.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARH! :D
and it was i think his best birthday la!
with a bestest present.
but our present wasnt that bad too.
we gave him cash in abs. vodka bottle. hahaha.

on Monday i went gown selection with my cousin.
The most significant feeling i had was when the designer laid the train of the gown on the floor.
It was so pretty, i had the urge to get married.
Because there was such a blissful feeling please.
Haha.
After that we went to swensens to indulge. Woohoo....

Went to celebrate wanru’s birthday for her on Tuesday.
With jieming and joleen.
Ate at shokudo at raffles place. And then starbucked to chit chat whee whee.
Nice. Laughed like i never had.

情非得已

2008-09-18T00:52:00.001+08:00

只怕我自己会爱上你

不敢让自己靠的太近

怕我没什么能够给你

爱你也需要很大的勇气

只怕我自己会爱上你

也许有天会情不自禁

想念只让自己苦了自己

爱上你是我情非得已

time to study.

stop thinking.

mental distraction.

2008-09-02T18:33:00.002+08:00

CONFUSED.

my heart's in a turmoil, again.

and it did hurt to think of the past.

to think of what I had to let go,

though I know I hadnt lose it all yet.

i need a guide to lead me out of this whirlpool.

LOVE LOVING LOVED.

untitled

2008-08-17T03:33:00.002+08:00

hall life is fun as usual.
im going to suggest to my mum that i stay for the next year.
cos actually i only wanted to stay for an experience.
so i have to start joining games and coms to earn some points.
but i think if i cant concentrate on studying in hall. then i might not stay la.

after much difficulty, i finally found an elective that fits my timetable!
and it's malay. but when i went at 9.58 to add, it loaded so long, my vacancy went to someone else.
for your info, 10am is when the add/drop period starts.
anyhow so during lab lesson i went to search for more elec.
whereby i found a soci module and a physics(sound) module.
added both and still none of the lessons clash cool!
so now im overloaded.
but i think im going to drop soci, cos beavan says it aint nice, at all.

welcome week was last week.
see hall events so busy. hahaha. inter block games start on monday! netball first!
we went ice skating on tuesday, movie screening (the island) on wednesday, and buffet/cultural night on thursday. i havent get the pictures yet though. cool week la! they bought us lots of food and all these stuff for just $7
however, D&D will be more expensive at $60.
tsktsktsk. FUNFUN.

dinner on tuesday to celebrate joseph's birthday too.
ASTRO's so steady. they met up for dinner, disperse then met up for supper.
totally cool people HAHA, i like!

on tuesday i went to check out the IT fair at the auditorium.
i had some difficulty finding it. then i went to the library (some difficulty too).
took 3 hours to find the 2 places, walk around and print notes.
eventually i had to ask alvin to bring me back to south spine. HAHA
i swear im better at navigating around NTU now!

to buy my laptop. i went on the first day to check out the 3 laptops that i have shortlisted.
M800's quite cool, but relatively heavier than S6520. versa5600 looks nice in colour, but condemned by too many. so i talked to the different people at the counter. i think at least 3 fujitsu people came to talk to me, 2 NEC and 1 toshiba. haha.
second day i went by again, this time to consider M800 and S6520. more fujitsu people and toshiba people on top of the first day's came to talk to me.
more convinced to buy S6520. cos since i dont game, the nxt impt thing is weight and outlook.
obviously 1.7kg s6520 has the advantage. it's light man!
so because one can only withdraw $2000 per day, so i have to wait till 3rd day to buy HAHA!
3rd day i went back again. this time those people recognised me already.
and i went to disturb another fujitsu person and asked him to convince me to buy from 90% to 100%. so he told me more stuff that the rest didnt tell me.
how nice. HAHAHA. they are all nice people! but my laptop feels heavier after i bought it.
so i went back and said they lied to me HAHAHA. just kiddddding.

anyway zhengxi was late for lessons (and thus free), so he came by to help me carry my laptop and we went for lunch (meeting zhenming, and some others) woohoo. im such a princess! (:
but at least he didnt have to queue with me right HAHA.

HAHA. anyhow thanks to the dumb school i came home only on saturday.
they gave us a NATIONAL DAY HOLIDAY on MONDAY.
and make it up on a SATURDAY like WTF.
at least if they make it up on a weekday, most people are still in school.
now im short of a night of stay at home.
i miss the bed, the bolster. rahrahrah.
it was lonely in hall la.

went for lesson on saturday morning.
was reading TWILIGHT. read during lecture, on the way back to hall.
series of misunfortunate event.
went to SAO with wingki but office was closed.
bus stop was closed so we decided to walk back.
wingki was tired at can 2 and decided to take 179 loop one round and out of ntu.
i saw bus C and board it to go one big round la.
however bus c stopped operations at can A bus stop, so i have to change bus.
199 came and i boarded it.
continued reading and the next thing i knew the bus went past hall 11.
pressed the bell but the busuncle didnt stop.
i guessed he didnt think that people will alight at that stop.
went till outside before i get to alight and change to opposite side to board a bus back to 11.
feeel so stupid hahaha!

saturday night was spent with Astro.
we went to st james to support candice and daryl in the pageant.
was extremely late. supposed to meet at 5 but i met them around 7 instead.
hiakhiak. skipped dinner with them la.
basically it was just sitting around(i mean standing) as well as cheering occasionally.
geek and glam segments. and games.
daryl got 2nd runner up and mr. vagary (watch brand)
he thinks he got the mr vagary cos he heard there was this award and all his poses were like those that watch models strike HAHAHA.
candice got 1st runner up!

Astro eh char bo si bei chio arh.
yio, di, sar, si, (x2)
Astro eh tar bo si bei yandao.
yio, di, sar, si (x2)
wa lang si ASTRO wa lang si bei SUD.
wa lang si ASTRO wa lang si bei ZAI.
bo bei zao bo bei zao bo bei zao!
woooo xD

updates on ntu life.

2008-08-09T15:03:00.002+08:00

lol. im here to update again.
after so long.

so these 2 weeks were filled with camps!
20-26 Jul UOC
27 Jul -2nd Aug HALL FOC.
met 2 groups of friends! (family!)
both groups filled with different kinds of characters.

ASTRO for UOC!
very fun yet tiring one week.
shuffled between 3 chalets and hall.
played many games.
especially loved fright night cos for the first time i was brave and i played with the "ghosts" instead.
but when they brought me to OCH and SIA sports hub i damn scared laaaa HAHA.
beachgames, poolgames, amazing race, schoolgames, etc.

we already had our first OG outing on 2nd aug.
ate crabs and some other food. and B&J for dessserts! YUMMY.
pictures up next time bah.

TAZA for HALL FOC.
met my neighbours and the people who will be in my neighbourhood for the next 1 year.
the games went something like UOC.
so its very fun as well.
but i thought the best of camp was after the worst of the camp.

they blindfolded us from like 11pm to next morning 6am.
and when we finally can remove the blind folds,
you find people standing in 2 rows, with only candles lighting the pathway.
you walk down a spiralling staircase lined with these candles.
and as you walk down the aisle, the hall seniors are around, welcoming you to the big family.
personally i nearly cried.
if not for the fact that i was so pissed i was blindfolded for so long and so tired. HAHA.

BEST OF ALL,
many of these camp mates like to SING SONG TALK COCK PLAY MAHJONG!
wooooooooooohooooooooooo!

okays the above section was typed like i think on monday. hahaha.

as for the past week, it has been a very boring school life but very interesting hall life.
i have only 1 lecture everyday (week 1 has no tutorial).
so you can say im actually very free.

taza meets up for dinner everyday. i think we are cool.

hahah most of hall night life is spend in THE MEETING ROOM. (junhao's room)
all the gossips. random eating sessions. cards sessions. stupid games sessions. woohoo cool.
and the most classic of it all. they finished half a bottle of vodka, has nothing else to play with.
so the loser has to eat banana with the banana skin! woohoo! thank god i only lost once.
so i only ate it once and it was still FRESH then. can you imagine towards the end when it turns soft soggy yellowish and blackish. yuck man hahaa.

supper with ansel, ken and junhao.
supper with astro.
cool man. i got to sit car out twice.

ron came to fetch me to attend andrew's grandpa's wake.
and they actually got me to play mahjong there.
but we only played dong and nan. and i won $25. won all 3 of them (ron, ricky and jacq)
hahaha used the money to buy food at pasar malam for them as well as some food for those in hall. (not all arh) didnt buy enough. so it was gathering at The meeting room again.

i sleeep at like 4am everyday? haha but wake up at 1pm. cos only got afternoon lectures.

am beginning to know more hall 11 people outside taza. and i think that's cool.

HALL 11. Im loving it (:

very boring post with no pictures haha

2008-07-16T00:41:00.002+08:00

today's (i mean yesterday's) my last day of work!
(15th july) 6 months literally flew by man.
i'll blog pictures when i upload them.
but yar im touched by one and all who gave me their blessings, all gave me my presents.
THANK YOU!

i love CCC and SS because they shared presents.
and i didnt expect my departure to affect so many people.
MANY LOVES!
i'll continue this entry again when im free.
like tomorrow afternoon maybe.

met up with the barker boys on sat too.

random post.

im not missing.

2008-06-29T21:46:00.003+08:00

lest people (like wanru, raymond) think i have disappeared,
because i haven been:
1) APPEARING ONLINE/AWAY.
2) REPLYING THEIR MESSAGES (cos i sent it for servicing for almost a week)
3) ANSWERING CALLS.
4) UPDATING MY BLOG.
here's my update!

and fyi, no harm trying to talk to me on msn.
i appear offline all the time.
so if you are lucky, i might actually be there.

but i cant remember whatever that has happened.

i am still working in canon!
left with about 2 working weeks only ):
that's pretty sad to know.
almost time to prepare some stuff.
and pack up my stuff.
(there's so much things, some packable, others not)

i have chosen NTU MATHS & ECONS.
got invited for NUS BIZ INTERVIEW but failed it.
haha what lousy boohoo. my competitors had AAAB grades but chose biz as 2nd choice.
but suddenly want to come biz. -.-
not an excuse though la. it's my destiny.
HAHA.

have submitted my hostel application.
gonna stay with xianmin. that's exciting.
can you imagine the nightly bitching sessions.
HAHA what the hell.
and wonder if life will be hell without aircon.
I AM ALREADY DYING ALMOST EVERY NIGHT.
cos the whole aircon unit in my home shut down.
:(

i think im attending union's FOC with xianmin.
and hopefully our hall foc.

was at PC SHOW 2008 @ suntec.
took paid leave (for thurs&fri) to work there for canon.
so lame but you know there are certain T&Cs.
but since im going to earn money at both sides why not man.
i love june's pay just like i liked march's pay.

started my swimming regime again last week.
hope i wont get lazy anymore.

hmm going for a durian buffet this wednesday.
it's organised by canon. $5 for canon staff and $8 for the rest.
but im counted as the rest because im just a contract staff
wah damn sad.
but im still going to attend the durian party albeit not with my own department.
because they dislike/think it's smelly. HAHA.

june passed relatively quick.
its like half of 2008 gone.
and not like the first half was fantastic (my life was great) but not at other places
so hope the second half will be fantastic!

so and i once mentioned there's no internet access for me at canon right?
(besides the .edu .gov websites, or the starhub/singtel websites)
NO EMAIL ACCESS, NO MSN.
only connection is thru hp.
but with my recent matriculation, i now have access to my NTU email.
which i can access woooohoooo!
so if any of you want to email me,
let me know.

OH haven been watching the EURO.
but with all the black horses showing up.
i might be watching the finals later.
seeee how arh.
then have something to talk about with my colleagues. HAHA.
and if i can just di-siao patricia. HAHAHHAAAA.

time to go.
BYEBYE!

shit.

2008-06-07T22:12:00.002+08:00

have been thinking alot of my india days lately.
first with myself,
then there was some video that sihui posted on the blog.
(the video was about another group who were there the same period of time)

and then today i thought about something.
our favourite topic for the whole trip.
we talk about it WITHOUT FAIL daily.
we see it DAILY. HAHA.
we see the different kinds and the different forms.
im referring to SHIT.
hahah save the pictures for ourselves yeah.
i have so many kinds.
but just in case some people just had dinner or something,
i shall not post it up.

anyway during the trek, we once wondered how long is the LONGEST recorded SHIT.
okays so to follow up on it i went to search.

it is 26 feet long! that's almost 8 metres?
how come the person got so much shit man~

http://www.poormojo.org/pmjadaily/archives/006472.php

HAHA

"no regrets"

2008-06-05T00:23:00.001+08:00

out of say 7 blogs that i read (that stated what course and which school they accepted)
these 7 bloggers are all going NUS FASS.
shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit. i dont want to regret.
isnt anybody going somewhere else?
HAHA

hitching a ride!

2008-06-03T22:32:00.000+08:00

omg im so regretting not knowing the SS people earlier.
one of them actually stays within 100m of my house.
and he drives to work!
wakes up 45 minutes later than me leave home half an hour later than me.
blooooooooooody hell.
thank god andrew, for i know you now (:

but today after chatting with the few of them,
realised that andrew stays in toapayoh (his face was shocked).
because when i said kim keat. he was like omg i lived there before i shifted to the current house.
so all his life he stayed in toapayoh.
coool. im going to hitch daily rides for the remaining one month plus.
man i could have saved like $200 haha.
but its never too late.

oh and anyway ive accepted NTU maths and econs.
but im still hoping my appeal will be successful though.

hf is leaving soon.
im going to do all the work.
and more than when she's here.
im sad yet happy. HAHA.

today i did something weird.
i went around office to collect namecards.
im gonna leave this place soon.
and enter school.
excited. yet worried.

cooooooooooooooooool.
i can wake up at 7.15 tomorrow!

imstressed.

2008-05-30T02:23:00.002+08:00

im going away tomorrow.
and ive gotta accept by monday (and get the docs in by monday if i choose nus)
means it's either i send out by tml or i go down personally on mon (if i choose nus)

but after much stressed out thinking and seeking opinions.
i think im going to NTU.
and the thing is when i want to accept the course, the website's down!
what is the message man.
and i wont be online tomorrow.
so someone please remind me to accept on sunday night pretty please?

ive also appealed for both schools.
im a loser cos i got rejected from what i want.
ntu acc and nus biz.
50 words vs 1000 characters appeal letter.
i maximised usage for both.
though i did not include very constructive stuff.
but i certainly hope one of these school accept my appeal.
i'll be extremely delighted please.

anyway went mambo for the first time *yes im a suaku*
with wanru jieming and their friend. erm cheryl is it?
anyway justina went there too and i only knew about it when i came home to read her blog.
too bad i didnt see her there hahaa.

im still stressed.

after attending the wake, and the service.
some questions stuck me.
the uncanny similarities in both events.
yet the diverse atmosphere at both places.
the happiness vs the sorrow.
yet it seemed the same procedure.
just that the (: became ):

only i'd understand this paragraph.

nonetheless,
i wished every single one around me will pray for my successful appeal.
though i read in forums that chances aint high at all.

oh ya i cried a solid 2-3 hours watching the sichuan earthquake donation drive show.
even hearing them sing about the situation is saddening.
so to all those who lost a loved one recently.
my blogpost's gonna be in black and white.
simple monotony.

2008-05-22T22:36:00.002+08:00

okays HSA sent me a letter for my blood donation.
and i FINALLY (after 18years and 5 months?), finally know my blood type.

I AM A A+ HAHAHHAHAHA.
so excited to find out my blood type.
my brother is same blood type like me.

my mum can save us if we need blood.
but we cant save her AWWW!
she's an O. muahaha.

today we had stock take in the office.
everything was on the roll.
it's like technician come submit reports and we have to debrief.
coool.
and the technicians look like they were taking examinations when they were checking their own stocks.

next week's slacking day.
in fact this month's slacking month.
not much OT done.
blahhhhh.

girls' dinner out with prisca and surini again.
girls' night out MAMBO! with wanru and jieming and friend.
and malaysia for the weekend!
woohoo im taking 2 half days off next week.
how cool man.

oh and i was trying to recall what i need to blog.
i watched champion's league this morning.
it's such an exciting match.
i want to watch it again.
i like it when matches hit penalties.
it's bloooody intriguing.

for example ytd's match.
ronaldo missed his penalty and chelsea would have won if terry scored his.
but unfortunately not, missing a lot of luck there.
i wont comment much since i have friends from both camps.
but since it was a draw for the first 5 penalties.
it became a score-or-die match.
HAHAHA. shit man. it must be damn stressful for them all.
and its quite sad to see terry cry. ):

im bored.

HELLO UNCLE PEANUT :P

what's happening?

2008-05-15T00:46:00.003+08:00

the szechuan earthquake has been very heartwrenching.
i watched the news and cried.
it's so sad. there are so many of them kids.
so many younger than me.
so many unable to go through life beyond kids.
why i ask, why are so many things happening in 2008?

and somebody told me today.
natural disasters happen for a reason,
to offset the harm that human did to the earth.
how true can that be? i dont know.

i randomly asked the office why china has so many probs.
the snowstorm, the tibet thing, HFMD, the earthquake.
boss answered. maybe god is trying to stop something.
dont tell me something bad will happen at the big O.
i dont wanna know.

if it's not war, it's disasters.
otherwise it's accidents.
it's death no matter what aint it.
where is the love.

the last week was tiring.
probably due to the numerous nights with insufficient sleep.
i slept everyday during lunch and it seems not enough.
im damn bloody tired.

on an even sadder note.
im going to grow fatter this week.
reasons as follow.

sunday - buffet dinner at grandma's place to celebrate mother's day.
mahjong and food.

monday - carl's jr dinner with wanru and jieming.

tuesday - subway lunch with xi'an.

wednesday - popeye's dinner with prisca and surini.

thursday - buffet dinner at copthorne king's hotel to celebrate my mum's mother's day.

friday - dinner at aunt's place

saturday - NTU SPMS lunch.

how not to grow fat you tell me.
and im not even working OT because of the dinner.
so it's like fat and not earning money. CONS AND CONS. not even PROS and CONS.

it's PAYDAY TODAY though! xD finally something to be happy about.
muahahahahhahaa. money not as much as last months' but still enough HAHA.

actually received an invitation from NUS ytd to attend FASS DAY on saturday.
dated huiqi out.
received an invitation from NTU today to attend SPMS lunch on saturday too.
what a coincidence.
both on the same day?
HOW TO MAKE MY CHOICE LIKE THAT.
HAHAHAHA.

so think ive gotta meet hq abit later.
:/

happy 35th.
happy payday
happy day HAHA.

2008-05-05T22:47:00.001+08:00

favourite picture (:
that's me and wuzun. HAHA.

the rest, view it here http://flickr.com/photos/56355789@N00/tags/0605bbq/

class chalet 2008

2008-05-04T15:37:00.002+08:00

haha.
the previous entry was not meant to be "scandalous", justina. HAHAHA.
still cannot believe i cheated you.

my previous entry was actually meant for my acceptance letters which by the way, have been received.
the day after i complained, the NUS letter came.
but damn i was overnight-ing at xianmin's house and i was eager to know. so i couldnt open my letter.
darn, didnt get into accountancy nor business. that stupid C for geog i will remember you always. :(

steamboat was good.
xianmin and her brother cooked the soup with lots of ingredients first.
me, xianmin, yichun, bronson and tenghon.
then we started mahjong and i didnt win at all for the first half (dong and nan feng)
but my luck changed thereafter.
and i just kept winning muahahaa.

got a lot of 5 tais.
but throw out a lot of 4 tais as well.
there was one round bronson bao-ed and have to pay for everybody to me.
the most classic one was the last round.
i was waiting for BEI FENG (got 1 tai okays) and i think nobody will throw.
so i prayed very hard for it.
GOT MY WISH, I WANT TO THANK MY GOD.
and zi mo 5 tai (which is $20 more)
sole winner of $63 winnings. goodness gracious.
played till morning then i went home to sleep.

went for chalet on friday morning.
justina huiqi and me.
got a freaking shock when i tried to check in.
cos realised my mum aint a union member and the person said i have to top up $200.
i nearly went mad. cos my mum USED TO BE one.
and i sent my dad home cos i said i can handle the check in.
luckily dad's a member and he came back to help me MUAHAHA.
the person was being anal and said my mum must come to sign the transfer of ownership thing.
my mum's IC was with me okays. -.-
and so was my dad.
but they let us in nonetheless.
xiaobai kaiyang came.

we played cards and slacked in the aircon.
the weather was horribly humid. HOT HOT HOT. DAMN IT HOT!
then we went shopping for ingredients for the barbecue.
as well as have our dinner @ subway.

huiqi then received a call from her sister that both her NUS and NTU letter has arrived.
so i called home on instinct that my NTU letter has arrived too.
my dad went to open the letterbox and there it was.
damn the C for geog again. i missed out on accountancy and business as well RAH
cant say im disappointed cos it became kinda expected after NUS's letter came.

slacked and played around. talked watch tv and we sleeeepppt! HAHAHHAA at about 2am.
to tao ze's songs. by then sarah was with us too
so there were 4 beds.
ky to one. then me and xiaobai to one. justina and yumin. and huiqi and sarah.
great. it was comfortable TILL THE AIRCON SHUT DOWN. cos yumin and sarah went out to macs with the keys at 3am!
HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH it was shitting hot. i couldnt sleep and i kept complaining.
~~i am a pampered child.~~
im gonna stay in aircon all day long if the weather stays like that.
CANON IS COOL ALL DAY LONG HAHA

xiaobai went for her driving test (which she claims she can get full marks) and ky went out for another class outing.
and the rest of us went for MAC'S BREAKFAST! woohoO! yumin redeemed one main course for each of us with her points.
and she still has 1500+ she had like 3000+ points but mac is closing this points system thingy so she treated us WOO!!!
saved some cash. gillian came!

went back to the room to sllack again and eat our breakfast.
by the time we finished, the weather was sickly warm.
and gillian insisted on going out. which most of us were rather reluctant to do so HAHA. weather so hot!!!!
hanisah and shahid dropped by. we played TABOO.
it was crappy funny! ive not laughed so hard in a long while!
entertaind us for a little while and gillian and sarah went to escape.
cos it was hot outside and expensive and waste of money to go escape.
so the rest of us stayed put and daidee-ed.

prepared for barbecue and went to get the rest of the stuff.
group work rocks. but preparation sucks.
came back and went to the water dispenser point to wash bacon with jiawei.
rinsing it with running water.
then sarah and naima were washing stingray in the toilet basin where we brush teeth?
haha stupid chalet no kitchen.
so ya jiawei came.
shuen came. kaiyang came back.
start fire. start cooking. kailing and ego came.
MAPOK THE PANGSEH QUEEN.
alcohol appeared.
eat. drink. have fun.

so we kinda became high.
they(ky shuen justina) were throwing chicken bones, satays, charcoal at each other.
with people staring.
went to play volleyball with jiawei a little while.
the ball was HARD. rahhh!
then we were laughing like nobody's business.
talked loudly and we were just going mad.

went to bathe with shuen and justina.
and in the toilet i went to twist the shower head upwards and the water shot across justina's cubicle
into shuen's cubicle (3rd cubicle) it was freaking funny la!

watched tv till 1am.
then headed out to E!Hub. wanted to bowl but it was not worth it!
$4 per game per head. and shoes+socks $3.
how much we have to spend to keep the night going man.
so i said go watch movie more worth it. then shuen asked them and so we went to choose movie.
THE FORBIDDEN KINGDOM has the only available timeslot./
and we went in after getting the tickets.
show was crap. funny at some parts but damn exaggerated.
rendition of the sunwukong story was errrrrrrrrrrrr. HAHHA.
caught gillian and shuenlin falling asleep can.

went back to the room at 3am and we taboo-ed till 5am.
this time the rules changed and we could make noise to disturb the opposite team.
xiaobai who was between me and ky, was totally owned.
she was so disturbed by us she couldnt describe the words.

and we wanted to go watch the sunrise.
but then suddenly we all went one by one. im tired i want to rest.
and plop we settled in our positions and slept! HAHAHAHHA!

and now im home cos dad fetched me home.
skipped breakfast with them HAHA to sit the car.
though alot of time was spend indoor. i spent like $50 for these 3 days already can.
(plus i went shopping and bought dresses and tops.........................)
i cant imagine the cost if we went bowling, escape, night cycling......
woohoo the hole in my pocket.
but nonetheless the whole event was fun.
all the laughing and crapping amidst talks about university stuff.
i like gathering. we all want to go back to school.
but its so tiring to plan MUAHAHHAA.

photos must wait till kaiyang uploads them.
(his canon 400d)

huiyen. huiqi. huixian. justina. kaiyang. sarah. jiawei. eileen. kailing. shuenlin. hanisah. yumin.

hahaha right. now im in a dilemma.
i duno which school to go to.
NUS FASS (economics most prob)
or
NTU (combined degree for maths and economics)

i still have some time to think over.

the game of waiting.

2008-04-29T23:31:00.002+08:00

im stuck in this game of waiting.
with no beginning nor ending.
and i am tired of waiting.
it's so difficult to pass each day,
waiting for you to reach me one day.
thank god for the workload i give myself daily.
it takes my mind off you for a couple of hours.
but once im free, i cant help but fret over things.

and i dont want to give myself a chance to think that im going nowhere.

HAHA.

anyhow ive been really busy at work because of the extended warranty we sold at the IT show.
boss delayed billing for so long that the accounts department are chasing us for tax.
so we've gotta chiong things out. and with numerous mistakes, it's so difficult to get things right.
because we are doing things over and over again. experimenting with trial and error to find out why the amount doesnt tally. OT for the month of april has hit 50 hours. great. and thus you can see i spend most of my time at work. ive become a lifeless person.

but then again. im just earning more moolahs to spend in the coming future hiakhiak.

labour day on thursday! took leave on friday. im gonna have a relatively longer weekend break!
yays!

mahjong&steamboat @ xm's tomorrow.
labourday with the folks.
classchalet on fri.sat.sun.

so many events.
ka-ching ka-ching.

im tired HAHA byebye!

gossip at shuen's ytd was exciting.
right MAPOK?!

quickie.

2008-04-15T00:24:00.002+08:00

HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY EMMELINE (15th april)!
LOVE YOU WOMAN EVERY BIT.
remember our double date and our tanning session.
and lots of other weird stuff and chit chatting sessions and etc etc etc.
quick = etc HAHA.
stop bingeing!

HAPPY 34th MONTH to YOU! (14th april)
time you look for a new girlfriend already laaaa.
it's been almost 3 years.
you wont want this to go on for a decade! HAHA.
though i know im the best in your life.
unforgettable right MUAHAHAHAHA!

i finally donated blood for the first time.
mustered enough courage to go with my brother.
(humji in school cos of people fainting/getting blue blacks)
it's not that painful.
manageble.
gek qiang me never sit down after donating.
go and kaypoh my brother whose hand was super painful god knows why.

set off to pray to my grandfather.
and I passed out in the temple.
malu malu.
vomitted after regaining my consciousness.
realisd folks each took one of my legs to massage.
uncle was drenched cos he ran back to his car to fetch his AXE OIL.
brother was checking my eye.
its quite bad.
the temple was crowded you see.
paiseh paiseh.

realised im losing more blood at night.
tsktsk.

no time
goodnights
byebye.

happy errrrrr 14th!

2008-04-10T23:47:00.004+08:00

2 minutes before midnight.
but yeah HAPPY BIRTHDAY SISTER!

this year is the first year i spend SO MUCH MONEY, TIME AND EFFORT on her birthday.
working makes me become a better sister cos im richer!
HIAK HIAK!

my brother baked a cake for her too.
pictures up next time.
cos im really tired! sewn something for her till 2am! BOO!

BYEBYE! GO TEKONG!

2008-04-09T07:47:00.002+08:00

today my last batch of male friends are enlisting.
which means, there aint any outing with any of them on weekdays.
HAHAHA.

it's a girls' week out everyweek! (:

4 points.

2008-04-05T18:24:00.003+08:00

1) ive got a HUGE GIGANTIC RED SWELLING pimple between my eyes.
2) my indian colleague asked me if i want to be one of them.
3) im going night cycling with some of the guides later and we are meeting at 8.45PM. rightt HAHA.

last but not least (this is not counted HAHA)

4) HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY CHEEJIAWEI! dont forget to reply weichong. he complained.

im prolly not applying for SMU.

christine's joke

2008-04-02T23:27:00.003+08:00

today i went back to office and saw andrew (noris's husband).
and i excitedly asked him to show me the baby's photo.
then he told me the baby's at noris's desk (means diagonal from mine)
so i chiong there.

but HAHAHHAA.
christine, it's so not funny lor.
i saw noris (STILL ROUND! AND PREGNANT) sitting there.
TRUE! the baby is THERE.
but she's not given birth yet.

CHRISTINE TRICKED ME.
RAH IM SO SAD.
HAHA

who to turn a blind eye to?

2008-04-01T23:25:00.002+08:00

how does it feel to be blind?
i'll always meet this blind auntie who sells tissue just outside the train station.
she'll be there everyday,
her hand stretched out, holding packets of her products.
and i'll walk past after work (about 7plus),
just looking at her, but not buying from her.

yet today, her blindness hit me suddenly.
i walked past her like everyday.
and went to queue for my bus.
moments later, she went past me.
some auntie approached her to assist her.
while i just watched on.

i felt guilty for not being the first to go to her.
but the auntie came before the blind lady walked past me.

she boarded the bus first.
which was parked a little further from the curb.
though she tried to use one step to board the bus like we always do.
but it was too far, too difficult.
the uncle who was originally at the start of the queue helped her.

her bag was bulky,
filled with unsold tissue paper.
more people began to help her.
(my heart feels warm.

not all singaporeans are mean, kiasee, kiasu!)
to the seat.
to press the bell when she was alighting.
and i am still stuck at the same distance.
unable to do anything for her.
she alighted at the next stop.

but my thoughts didnt stop there.
there's something i want to do, to try.
not to mock, but to experience.

i want to close my eyes.
and look at the dark world in my vision.
resist the temptations to open my eyes.
and just to venture out to the world blindly.
it's going to be scary.
it'll be good if someone will be there to lead my way.
they are so brave to actually be out there alone.

for one day,
just one day.
i want to be blind.
dont want it to be permanent.
dont want to lose something i depend on.

but im such a coward.
i dont dare to try.
dont say a day.
an hour is probably tough enough.
:(

its not an april fool joke.
but nonetheless HAPPY APRIL'S FOOL DAY.
and congrats to my colleague noris who gave birth today!
a serious april's fool (:
i want to go visit her!
and the baby!

everybody's going for SMU interviews.
should I apply?
i only have a week more to decide.
rah/

anyhow today at dhoby ghaut i met a pair of lesbians.
im not against lesbians or anything.
but this is a weird pair. as compared to the normal ones that you see.
the weird thing is.
one is dressed like a guy.
(not the handsome kind. it's the loose t-shirt, long loose berms, high socks and nike (uncool kind) shoes.)
and the other dresses a little more tightly, in shorts and shoulder length hair.
the "guy" girl has hair longer than the "girl" girl.
and "he" carries "her" bag.
never mind, maybe it's the new fashion (which i haven heard of yet)
HAHAHHAA. and they were kissing on the escalator.
llike _____________- (fill in the blank)

im already half way through my contract with Canon.
how fast.
or how slow.
they are a bunch of fun people.
and im certainly glad my long stint with Canon is filled with nice colleagues.

plus the treats and the good food and the presents.

(in fact some uncle from the next next door department says he's going to buy me dinner sometime soon. because i always help him do things MUAHAHA)

im also half way through my holiday before school starts.
the 4/5As people have received calls to go for interviews for the business schools.
im nowhere there. shit.

today the company's system was down for 3/4 of the day.
so i sllacked the day away because my job requires the system.
went around chit chating, sitting around.
help them to cut paper.
dismissed earlier for lunch.
had a longer lunch.
and system was up for the last 1/4 of the day.
chance to work OT. HEEEEEEEEEEEE.

did 49 hours and 15 minutes of OT for the month of March.
including that of the IT fair.
i cant wait for 14th april.
though it's just a ONE-OFF thing for such bring home pay.

okays my entry is messed up.

im just blogging whatever i thought of.

and now the only thought is.

goodnight world. (:

FA HUA CHI

2008-03-22T00:37:00.002+08:00

thank god it's GOOD FRIDAY.
i know now i blog only every friday?
HIAK HIAK.

i actually blog an entry in office and it's in my thumbdrive.
i'll transfer it over later.

and you know because it's friday,
and it's a holiday, i slept till 3pm.
OMG.
its been long since i slept past afternoon.
it's so shiok.
and it's all because i was watching my girl till 4am.
HAHAHAH.
can watch it over and over again,
and not be sick of it.
woots.

anyhow
im about to make the decision that determines my life.
accounting or business(banking/finance)
im so scared it'll be a wrong choice.
but even Mr A. Tan says i should take accounting because business is so general.
im torn between choices.
and omg.
maybe i cannot even get into any of them la.

im supposed to go swimming today.
but it's raining.
BLAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
i can only go cardio at home now.
BOO.

the past 2 days,
was busy packing the office.
there's like tons of files.
dated back till 1993.
WTH i was only like 4 years old then haha/
but because of renovations,
they were thrown away yays!
too busy packing.
everyday OT till 8pm.
(MONEY MONEY COME).
MARCH'S PAYCHECK IS LOVE!

MONDAY. (from thumbdrive)

anyway.
the table im sitting at used to be vacant right.
so my colleague's son will come to this table if he comes on saturday.
it's his PALACE.
hahaha.

so the other time,
he left his name all over.
and i playfully replied on scotch tape.
"HI IM YOUR BEST FRIEND"

last saturday he came back again.
and he made a mess on my table.
he took things out of my drawer and arranged it on my table.
he wrote on my calendar his mother's birthday
(which is today HAHA, otherwise i wont know)
he left his storybook in my drawer.
and he also created many drawings on my board as well as my "wall"

the best of all is.
he opened the box of frosties in my drawer and eat.
as well as the chipsmore.
BUT he never seal it back one.
LUCKY never lao hong okays.
hahahaa.
i didnt bear to open it.
but since he did, ive been munching on it HAHA.
SHIT.

anyway right.
the office's undergoing renovation this friday.
(GOOD FRIDAY IS PUBLIC HOLIDAY YO)
HAPPY!
okays. and i'll be moving away from the people i know.
and i wont be able to walk around anymore.
-pouts bigbig (copies jiawei) :(
HAHAHA.

but he wont be doing this anymore after he's back from the camp.
I SHOULD THINK SO.
either that or he'll be whining about how tough training is.
tsktsk.

i typed this whole entry at 4pm.
but batt was flat and i was busy watching my girl.
so i didnt blog this till now.
now is actually 12.49am already.
but i changed the entry time haha.

i just finished MY GIRL.
i can watch it another time.
hahahahahaha.
it's so sweet.
sad, and romantic.
i can fa hua chi over the show itself.
i can laugh like a clown.
or smile like an idiot.
because it is such a swweeeeeeeeeeeet show.
damn.
i hope it happens in my life.
however, i dont want it to be so dramatic.
rah. dont know what im talking about.
but heeeeeeeeeeeee. i like i like them all.

he's so cute.
omg i am so in love with him.
i can dream of him tonight.
those sweet dreams.
woohoo.
i have such a good imagination,
i can dream of myself to be YOULIN.
HAHAHAHAHAH.
(:

and few hours after what i blogged earlier on,
i actually haven submit my application HAHA.
shit.

gossip.

2008-03-15T13:46:00.002+08:00

okays TGIF seems a little too late.
but yeah TGIF ytd because i would be damn tired if today's not a saturday.
shit loads of stuff happened if you are interested to know.
but if you are not, it's just too bad.
MUAHAHA.

this week seems short.
i guess partly because it's due to MC on tuesday.
HAHA.
but anyhow after work i headed over to GREAT WORLD CITY to find JUSTINA.
she said im the only few who bothered to visit her at work.
lol, i had too much time to spare maybe?
so waited for her to finish work at 10pm,
then we headed to town for coffee.
starbucks! and chatted till 11plus pm.
reached home midnight lo!
but it was great la!

time flies when you put two gossipers together.
muahaha. at least we are on the same frequency right.
KEKE. (yuck)

then came friday.
first of all HAPPY 33 MONTHS (:
secondly, HAPPY PAY DAY!
the full pay's in! after cpf. still got $1200+ HAHAHAHAHAH.
i love OT.
but i will love MARCH'S PAY AS MUCH OKAYS.

digressing,
some indian woman from some (i cant remember what) international offered me a job.
near CEDAR, MACPHERSON area and $9/10 (according to her la)
she said minimum $7, then i was like issit $7/9/10.
she say must ownself negotiate.
so i might be going down for interview.
not that canon's not nice.
but come on.
i save on time transportation and earn more money (even without OT!) so why not.

i'll see how la huh.

so we didnt OT on friday.
because it's division's dinner.
SAFRA MOUNT FABER (BUFFET+FREE BOWLING)
i didnt bowl though.
didnt want to break my nails.
they are too long and fragile.
HAHA.

the food turned cold under the air con.
i think it's like 15deg?
i was shivering and turned to my pregnant colleague for warmth.
was being the ENCOURAGER! HAHA.
because somehow the other lanes people are damn zai (which they claimed they were not).
but compared to my colleagues whose balls kept rolling into drains.
those people are experts!

that aside,
i think the company is beginning to acknowledge that we are not just temp staffs.
ever since IT show i see more goodies coming to me.
firstly, on wednesday, bigboss treated me to lunch.
to reward me for the hard work.
biggerboss gave me the chocolate remember.
directboss extended the invitation to division dinner to me (not like that usually).
and bigboss suddenly came over with this bagpack. (targus/tragus)
and presented it to me for top seller.
the whole department was looking and it's damn paiseh.
seriously................ i just did what i can la.
HAHA.
(and evil me is thinking of leaving. rahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh)

so my bag was damn full of barang barang ytd.
because JIN TIAN BU HUI JIA! (not going home).
my bosses thought im going to chiong.
WELL SUPPOSED TO, but we decided to head over to theodore's house instead.
he says free alcohol okays!

met justina again at great world!
keli was there with her.
and we headed to CASUARINA for rotiprata with theodore.

*i saw the start of the road.
i thought of you.
i saw the cars zooming out of the road.
and i knew.
they went past where you were.
flashbacks of what may happened appeared.
and i secretly hoped the cars will slow down.*

heard some rumour.
i dont know if it's true.
but i dont think so la.
(okays this part is unnecessary)

theodore was randomly saying the road inside very dark.
and asked if we wanna venture.
of course no.
i dont wanna appear there in the dark.
where cars are challenging the bends.
maybe i'll just take a stroll next time in the day.

right before we went to eat prata.
this is damn disgusting.
we saw a couple making out in the car in the carpark.
so justina and i were both taking turns to check them out (not that obviously)
so i just turned and saw one of them climbing on top of each other.
OMG WTF RIGHT.
when justina saw. she stared.
and realised they are two guys.
seriously WTF.
theodore came and he saw.
and he said the car was jerking.
i dont have to continue the WTFs yeah?
totally screwed our appetite haha

the prata shop aint 24 hours.
and it was already 11 plus right
at 12 they asked us to eat faster already HAHAHHAA.
the pratas are big and nice woohoo! Lol
*must remember to pay theodore.
he always rejects the money.

and when keli cabbed home (to study for blocks :()
theodore gave her whatever he had left $7 (prata's $18)
keli returned.
and theodore helped to close the door when keli boarded.
the thing is! just as he close, he threw the $7 into the car.
he's so nice right!

went to his house.
it was past midnight.
and his mum was cooking fish maw.
to prepare for tonight's dinner.
that's how dedicated his mum is to cooking.

and then we saw.
THEODORE'S REWARDED THE BEST TRAINEE OF THE COMPANY?
and he says him and his folks get to cut queue when they book out.
like woohoo, he's damn zai.
HAHA.

slacked in the room,
chatted.
we took the yearbook and started to flip randomly.
to gossip about people hahah
(EMMELINE TAUGHT THIS TRICK OKAYS!)
(SO YOU CAN KNOW ABOUT EVERYBODY WHOM YOU MIGHT HAVE MISSED OUT ON)
and soon we were all sleeepy.
see how bad it is to meet on a friday after work?!?!?!?!
lol.

they said i was behaving like i am drunk HAHA.
and i was damn sleepy first while they were getting high on PSP.
they got sleepy after seeing my face but when they became sleepy,
i was damn awake LOL!
and i started to disturb them.
me and justina were lying on the lower deck (which is bigger)
and theodore on the upper deck.
so justina and i were like trying to reach his deck but our legs were too short.

and we fell asleeeep.
i woke up the earliest because the aircon was freaking cold.
and my blanket got snatched away by justina who was rolling around.
i was like rolled up into a ball because i was so freaking frozen.
theodore was enjoying and snugged up in his comforter la damn it.
HAHA.
so i decided to disturb them from sleep too.
and they were so pig they couldnt get up!

tsk.

was that a message you were trying to put across?
what were you thinking?
was it an act of friendliness?

now im home and heading out to NUS OPEN HOUSE!

fatigue.

2008-03-13T00:28:00.002+08:00

okays. like the boy in my class is finally enlisting.
putting his pouts and whines aside, i wish him all the best in camp.
hope you will come out tanned (i think you will because everyone did),
and strong. with muscles. losing those flabs.
maybe if you can, look fab like ah fat (no longer fat).
the days are long and tough.
but if you need someone outside that tekong world,
SMS any of us, with your lao pok phone with limited battery life.
or you know MMS us your BOTAK photo HAHA.
i swear i will laugh HAHA.
JIAYOU AND BE A MAN!
that's for jiawei. HAHAHAHHAA.
i know you wont read this, YET.

haha so you know my rich aunt (the one who buys my camera and stuff) surprised me with some cold hard cash ytd.
to reward me for my not that fantastic results.
she gave me a stack of $50 notes. HAHA.
$250 for an A. xD
i only accepted after she said my bro got $1000 for himself.
(but apparently my bro said he didnt get it, awwww)
woooohoooo!.
grandpa asked me to save the cash up for Uni. i sure will!
so dont bother eyeing my cash.
it's going to the bank.
$500 from aunt.
$400 from folks.
my pay on the 14th. (with OT)
totally cool!

suddenly ABB and AAC has a difference.
HAHA money-faced!

and guess what today my boss told me about the time that im supposed to put for my pay on the 6th, 8th and 9th of march.
it's damn freaking cool. in that three days, i earned at least $400.
i cant wait for march's paycheck. HAHA.

right.
i kinda fell sick and went voiceless after the IT fair.
went to work on monday despite only a few hours of sleep.
colleague was absent. she took mc.
was damn tired? slept lunch away and didnt work OT.
in the end tuesday i was still too tired.
i slept till 2pm and got myself a 2-day mc.
but i went to work today ya!
saved myself a day of MC.
got free lunch from edward (his form of reward for me slogging till im sick)
(as well as to get me to be involve in the next show HAHA).
and a box of choc from bigbosscharlene.
how cool!

department dinner on fri.
and meeting up with theo and i dont know who yet....
HAHA.
saturday is also a busy day.
NUS OPEN HOUSE, GRANDAUNT'S BDAY and CYCLING TRIP?

okays goodnights.
the medicine's making me groggy and drowsy.
oh theodore called me last night to chat a bit.
turns out the first batch of army boys have POP.
congrats!
now you guys have 12 days to get me out HAHA.

030703 a day to remember - ACE.

2008-03-08T01:51:00.000+08:00

today was judgement day.
somehow, the most important judgement in my 18 years of life.
because in kcs or cedar,
we know that we cant get anywhere worse.
we'll still get into a school,
it's just whether it's good or bad.

but today's results may decide how my life will go in future.
the local Us, private Us, or even the working option.
tell me who will not be afraid.

recovering from the fatigue from IT show,
i couldnt fall asleep last night rolling around, worrying about results.

woke up and went back to NY for morning assembly in uniform with justina.
totally cool.
mr sim was beckoning us to hurry (because we were late),
and when we went closer, he recognised we were ex students,
and brushed his hands to the other side.
so funny.

chitchatted with the teachers.
mostly the maths teachers. still as funny and nerve-calming.
went for chem and econs lecture,
before slacking in the canteen waiting for the 05 lunch at 12.30.
JAP FOOD was fantastic.
but we all didnt have the mood nor appetite to eat.

people my age started filing into the canteen at around 1.30.
by now, justina and i changed.
as the time approaches, we proceeded to the hall.
and as usual got the prize presentation for 3,4,5 and even 6 distinctions!
(i know VJ got 9! but we are NY HEE)
so last year the whole procedure was damn long.
this year to save time, they merely read out the person's name and make the person stand up then sit down.

only the TOPPEST few gets to receive on stage.
and damn if my GP class has say 18 people for example, 12 has at least 3 distinctions for H2.
especially the 0611 guys. they are all freaking smart please.
bingqiang and jiening tied at the TOP position (meaning #1) and they are both from the same class.

requested for nandwani to seal my results in an envelop, just like justina did.
didnt dare to view it.
i wasnt prepared at all.
seeing the expression of everyone (the joy or the sorrow),
i didnt have the courage.
as at all results day, i bursted out crying before i even saw my results.
waited for a while more.
until i was really calmed down.
and allowed hanisah to peep.
she had good news for me.
it aint that bad.
seeing physics didnt hav 100% pass, i thought i would fail.
but i didnt.

let mr yeo see the results.
before slowly asking him.
he patiently answered my questions bout my results.
thanks dude it really helped.
surprisingly my physics was not bad.
way way above expectation.

sense of relief.
and accomplishment.
and a little bit of disappointment.
but i have nothing to complain.
you reap what you sow!

but now i dont know where to go.
im at the crossroads once again.

to some of my friends.
dont give up on yourself.
it's time to really take a break for now.
so you guys, please hold on.
it's not the end.
like mr nandwani says, you are only 18.
and you hav about 60 years to go.
dont limit yourself to just an A level cert.
just try for anything and everything,
for anything and everything will be better than an A level cert.

oh and today is also hua chi day.

absence makes the heart fonder.
and im falling in love with you all over again.
so cute so cute.
you are my muscleman HAHAHHAHAHAHHA.
one black one white hahahahah!
HAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPY.

b&j at novena with yumin huiqi sarah and gillian.
before i went for dinner with emm, huii, clara and gongx.
well done.
it's a happy day!

work tomorrow!

Lethargic with a capital L.

2008-03-07T00:34:00.001+08:00

ok fuck.
i forgot to bring my camera charger back from office.
and since i wasnt at the office today.
shit i cant charge my camera.
no pictures tomorrow :(

but since justina got one at the IT show today....
hopefully she got it charged in time heehee.

my legs are sore,
and my back aching.
it sure aint fun to stand for hours.
thankfully i have one of the highest sales.
haha you reap what you sow okays!
met new friends there.
people my age my type.
rather than people my age but not my type.
you get it yeah.

getting results in about 14 hours.

time FLIES!

im still upset i cant take pictures damn!